Innocent
by hazelblye
Summary: Olivia Pope is a first year law school student and her professor is none other than Fitzgerald Grant. This story was inspired by the preview for "How To Get Away With Murder" and also by the Innocence Project aspect of "The Divide".
1. Chapter 1

_What is the point of being alive if you don't at least try to do something remarkable? _

_\- John Green, An Abundance of Katherines_

* * *

It is my first day of class on my first day as a first year law student. I'm nervous, ecstatic, nauseous, antsy, and so many things in between. I am one of the first people in the classroom this morning. I left Abby at our apartment because she was lagging and I had too many feelings swirling around my head and just had to get to class as soon as I could.

Students are slowly filing in and I can't help but people watch as they all enter. I've heard this is one of the hardest classes we'll take and not because its particularly difficult material, but because it's designed to weed out anyone who can't hack it.

It's about five minutes to 8:00 when Abby finds me and plops down next to me.

"Hey Liv, see I told you I'd make it on time." She teases.

I roll my eyes at her and don't respond as I continue to assesses our classmates.

"So apparently Professor Grant is really attractive."

I laugh, "Seriously? That's what you're focused on? This class could make or break us and _that_ is all you're thinking about?"

Abby shrugs, and suddenly a man walks down the aisle and to the front of the classroom.

I don't get a good glimpse at his face but I can see that he's wearing a dark grey suit, pale blue pinstripe shirt, and a navy blue tie. He sets a briefcase on the desk and he turns around.

I accidentally let out an audible gasp—though thankfully it seems like I'm not the only one—but I can't help it because this is the first good look I've gotten at his face and boy, he is gorgeous. He has a strong jaw and a deliciously crooked smile, his blue-grey eyes glimmer against his suit and he has gorgeous light brown, curly hair that is perfectly styled on his head so the front curl sits perfectly on top of his head like he's some old Hollywood star.

He starts to speak and I find myself mesmerized by his voice.

"I am Fitzgerald Grant and I am your Criminal Law Professor for this semester or as I like to call it," he turns around to write something on the chalkboard, "How To Get Away With Murder."

We are all silent and stunned for a moment while Professor Grant scopes us out, a knowing smile on his face.

"I teach this one class at Georgetown but 90% of my time is dedicated to my other job as an equity partner at Cabot, Rabb, &amp; Hotchner. I'm about to give you the biggest assignment of the semester. Your assignment is come up with a defense for the case I'm going to hand out. The students who present me the four best defenses will get internship positions at my law firm. Believe me, you want this internship."

He starts to hand out the case file to the students in the front row so they can pass it back. "I don't know what you've heard about me but I can assure you that I have been a practicing attorney for over ten years and I can see through every ounce of bullshit you throw at me. Do not try to suck up, do not try to get on my good side—I don't have one—unless you have the raw talent to get everything I ask of you done then don't waste your breath because it only gets harder from here."

He's been handing out the papers as he's been talking and when he gets to me, as he hands me the stack of papers, our fingers touch and I feel a jolt of electricity.

My eyes open wide as I glance up at him and I see that he's staring at me with a confused look on his face. He just continues to stare at me for a moment and then abruptly averts his eyes.

He moves on down the row and Abby grabs her stack and passes them back and then gives me a knowing look.

Thankfully Professor Grant starts to speak before Abby can say anything to me. "I have a code I use in my law practice, I call this code my moral precepts. There are four of them. I will tell you what they are but it's up to you to figure out why they are so important. Memorize them, know them, and use them."

He turns around the board and starts writing once again. "Number one: A quote from Malcolm X, 'I'm for truth, no matter who tells it. I'm for justice, no matter who it is for or against.' Number two: 'Never, ever screw with someone just because you can.' Number three: A quote from the genius of Lou Reed, 'It takes a busload of faith to get by'. And number four: 'Never be satisfied until justice has been served.' Figure out what these mean, you'll need them if you want to impress me even slightly."

He finishes writing and he turns back around to face us. "Yes, I am a defense attorney and there are many who say defense attorneys are the lowest of the low and if you think that, fine. But defense attorneys are necessary to the justice system. In order for our justice system to work we owe every single person the right to the absolute best defense they can get. I am damn good at my job, that's not bragging; that's just fact, and I put my faith in our justice system. It's not always easy but I do it day after day because I believe in the American justice system, obviously it has its flaws but the core of our justice system, 'Innocent until proven guilty', is what gets me out of bed in the morning. I'm not looking for lawyers, I'm looking for gladiators in suits."

When he says 'gladiators' he looks directly at me and I can feel my breath hitch in my throat.

"Class dismissed."

Everyone gets up and files out of the classroom but I can't seem to move. I'm sitting there staring at the case file in front of me because I'm a little afraid to look up at Professor Grant.

I'm knocked out of my stupor by Abby who grabs my arm and shakes me slightly, "Liv, come on we've got business law in a half hour and I need a coffee."

I nod my head and I gather my things and walk up and out of the classroom behind Abby. I tell myself not to look back but I can't help it and just as we are about to walk out of the classroom I turn and look at Professor Grant. He's still staring at me and I don't know why but I give him a small smile as I walk out of the room and to my great joy he reciprocates and oh my—his smile is gorgeous. I follow Abby into the hallway and I'm grateful she's going on about something and doesn't notice how flush my face is.

Abby and I have all our classes together which was a welcome surprise. We met our very first day at Stanford and we have been best friends ever since.

I'm grateful that we were smart and paid a little extra money to move into our apartment a week early because we have already been bombarded with homework.

Tuesday night feels like the first time we are able to sit down and actually have a breather.

We open a bottle of wine and we mindlessly scan through LexusNexus for case law on our laptops.

Abby looks up at me, "So I totally forgot about this until now, but what happened when Grant passed you that case file? You both looked kind of shocked."

I shake my head, "It was nothing. It was a shock, static electricity or something."

Abby scoffs, "I don't think that's the kind of shock it was."

I roll my eyes at her, "Oh come on, he's our professor can we please just drop this?"

Abby laughs, "I'm just trying to get you some action Liv!"

I shake my head at her but even so I can't help but laugh, "Oh Abs, you are a good friend."

"Look Liv, we're in law school now. I'm very proud of you for holding onto your v-card through undergrad but I have to say this is the perfect opportunity to cash it in. I mean think about it, you get experience and then when we graduate you get a job at a top law firm, meet a hot older lawyer, and boom! That's when life gets good."

I laugh at her as I continue to scan through LexusNexus for case law.

"I don't know. I think I've kind of psyched myself out. You know, like I've waited so long and built it up so much in my head that I'm worried it's not going to be at all like I imagined."

Abby laughs "If you're with a guy who knows what to do your first time will be just fine, don't worry about it. I mean, would you actually wait until marriage?"

"No!" I exclaim, "Absolutely not! I'm even more scared that if I wait that long then I'll do it and it will be terrible and I'll be stuck with that guy for my entire life. I'm just…I'm waiting for the right guy."

"What about Professor Grant?"

I roll my eyes, "I thought we were dropping this? He's a Professor, I'm his student, that would be so inappropriate."

"Yeah, inappropriate and _hot_!" Abby shrieks.

"Abby, it's not happening. Drop it."

She raises her hands in defeat. "Whatever you say Liv."

Thankfully she does drop the subject and we talk about our classes and the boys Abby finds attractive and after a little while we call it a night.

Wednesday morning rolls around and I'm ready for Professor Grant's class. He walks in the room and doesn't waste any time jumping right into work mode.

"I hope all of your are working on your defenses, I'll be expecting them next Wednesday. And since I talked most of Monday I want to hear what you have to say. You've had a couple days to think about my moral precepts and I want to know what you think they mean. Anyone?" He asks, glancing around the room.

I look around the room and I can tell that everyone is afraid to talk and without even realizing what I'm doing, I raise my hand.

He smiles and nods to me. "Would you like to start with just one or would you like to take a stab at all four?"

"All four." I say, with a confidence in my voice I didn't know I possessed.

"By all means, go for it."

I take a deep breath. "Well, the first one, 'I'm for truth, no matter who tells it. I'm for justice, no matter who it is for or against.' That I think is pretty obvious; in order for the criminal justice system to work you have to want justice above all else. You have to be willing to help those people who maybe can't or won't help themselves. You have to look at a bad situation and see that despite bad circumstances everyone is a person, everyone deserves to be treated with the level of respect all human beings are owed."

I pause for a moment and try to read Professor Grant's face but I cannot so I just keep talking.

"Number two, 'never screw with someone just because you can'. That one means that you should never withhold or set restraints just for the sake of basking in your own power and control. You can't abuse the powers you have been granted. You can't do things solely because of personal vendettas or want for power, you should maintain respect for the lives you are dealing with even when they are criminals."

This time I just continue talking, "Number three, 'It takes a busload of faith to get by.' This one isn't about faith in a religious sense, but about belief in something else that is un-seeable, untouchable, un-hearable, and that something is justice. You have to be able to go to work and believe that if you do your job correctly you are doing the right thing. Doing your duty the way you are instructed to do it, without need for recognition or the need for always-positive results. And number four; 'never be satisfied until justice has been served'. Well that one is easy, if you can do the first three then the fourth will prevail. If we can manage to seek justice no matter what the circumstances, to resist abusing the powers we have been grated, to believe in what we are doing whole-heartedly, then justice will prevail and we will have done our jobs."

I stop talking and Professor Grant is just staring at me. Finally, after what seems like ages he smiles, "That was brilliantly put. What's your name?"

"Olivia." I say boldly. "Pope."

He smiles, "Well Miss Pope, I appreciate your insight as I'm sure your fellow students do as well."

He spends the rest of the class discussing the syllabus and explaining a little more about the internship positions he's offering at our firm and class is over.

We make it through the morning and we meet up in a campus coffeehouse with several kids from class we have agreed to form a study group with.

We aren't studying right now, instead we are getting to know each other and just having a good time when all of a sudden Abby exclaims loudly, "Oh my god we got our advisor assignments!" And with that everyone turns to their computers to open their e-mails to see what advisor's they got paired with.

Abby announced she got Professor Langan and she's not too happy about it. Apparently he's not very helpful. Will and Quinn have Keller as well and they are all whining about it.

Harrison and Emily have Professor Mackenzie and they seem pretty happy about it, which makes sense because from her class yesterday she seems like she's going to be a good professor.

And Jake and Huck have Professor Roberts; I don't have him for any classes so I don't really know anything about him.

That's when Quinn turns to me and asks, "Olivia, who is your advisor?"

I haven't even opened the e-mail yet, "Um", I open it and scan down to find the name. "I have Professor Grant."

Abby whips her head around to me, her amber hair glowing even in the dim library light. "You got Grant? Lucky bitch!"

"I have Grant too." David chimes in, smiling at me from across the table.

I smile back at him and then Harrison speaks up. "You guys are lucky. I heard that Grant rarely takes advisees, and it's even more rare that they are first years. Apparently he only takes them as first years if he sees a lot of potential in them."

I can feel my cheeks turning flush and Abby laughs, "Well he certainly chose right, if any one of us is going to make it through it's going to be Liv. She was valedictorian of our class at Stanford, President of our Innocence Aid Chapter, practically got a perfect score on her LSAT, not to mention her slew of other extra-curricular activities."

"Abby," I hiss, I hate it when she brags for me. It's so awkward.

She rolls her eyes, "Oh get over it Liv, everyone's going to find out you're a genius sooner or later, apparently Professor Grant is ahead of the curve. You know what else he might be able to help you with? Getting laid!"

I smack her lightly on the arm and shake my head at her, "Abby don't be ridiculous, Professor Grant hardly seems like the type to sleep with students and I am definitely not the type to sleep with a professor."

Abby rolls her eyes at me, "Or anyone for that matter."

My eyes grow wide but thankfully no one seemed to hear her divulge my deep dark secret as they are all engrossed in their own conversations.

I look down at my watch and realize I need to leave. I stand up and start to gather my things, "I have to get going. I've got a phone call with my Dad soon."

Abby gives me a look of pity, "Good luck sweetie, don't let him ruin this for you."

I smile at her, "I won't. Thanks Abs."

I hurry out of the library and continue scouring the document I've been reading and when I turn the corner I come barreling into some unsuspecting stranger.

I drop my papers and I look up to see who I've run into and I'm completely mortified when I see that it is Professor Grant.

"Professor Grant I am _so_ sorry. I was engrossed in this file and I wasn't paying attention to where I was going. I apologize."

I bend down to start picking up my papers and he bends down with me and to my great relief he's smiling. "Don't worry about it Miss Pope. I like to see students doing their homework."

My eyes grow wide. _He remembered my name. I can't believe he actually remembered my name._

He hands me a stack of papers and we both slowly rise. "Thank you." I whisper, taking them from him.

"It looks like you're on to something there. I look forward to reading your defense strategy."

I'm at a loss for words so I just smile and nod at him, thankfully he doesn't seem phased.

"While I have you here we might as well make an appointment to meet, since you are my advisee."

"Um, of course. I'm free after lunch Monday through Thursday and all day Friday so whenever is most convenient for you will be all right with me."

He grins, "I'm a very busy man Miss Pope so I do appreciate your flexibility. If it's all right with you I'd like to meet tomorrow at lunchtime? I think we should get started as soon as possible."

I nod my head, "Yes, that would be fine."

"And since I'm robbing you of lunch with your friends it's only right that I provide you lunch, is there anything you particularly like?"

I shake my head, "Oh no, you don't have to."

"Nonsense Miss Pope, you're being accommodating and I appreciate that. You're going to have to sit through many a dull session with me so we might as well kick it off with a decent one."

I give him a small smile, "Okay, um, I'll eat just about anything." That's actually a huge lie; I'm a vegetarian but for some reason I've completely forgotten about that in this moment.

He grins, "I'll see you tomorrow Miss Pope and if you don't mind me saying, it was a pleasure to officially meet you. You come highly recommended and I look forward to seeing you thrive here."

I can feel my cheeks get hot and I nod my head, "Thank you Professor Grant." I have no doubt that recommendation he speaks of came directly from my advisor at Stanford, Cyrus Beene, I wonder how Professor Grant knows Cyrus? I guess that's just something I'll have to ask Cyrus later.

He walks away and I watch him go like a starstruck fangirl and when he rounds the corner I lean back against the wall. He is awfully dreamy and it seems quite unfair that he's my professor.

Sadly my phone brings me out of my daydream and I frown when I see it's my father. I begrudgingly answer my phone, "Dad. Hello."

"Hello Olivia, how is school?"

I sigh, he always gets right to the point. "It's going well Dad. I got assigned my advisor today and I think I'm going to enjoy my classes."

"That's good. I've checked on the status of your new car and it should be arriving sometime Friday afternoon."

I sigh, "Thanks Dad, I appreciate it." My father is the kind of person who thinks a new Mercedes will make up for the fact that he missed my college graduation, not to mention the majority of important events in my life thus far.

"You welcome Olivia. I need to know you're getting around safely and I didn't want you driving that old BMW across the country."

I sigh, I loved that BMW and I was extremely angry when my Dad announced that I wasn't allowed to drive it from Palo Alto to D.C. and instead he would buy me a brand new car. But it's useless to argue with my father, I've figured that out by now. "Yeah, Dad thank you.

He sighs and I just know he's looking at his watch, "Olivia, I know we set up this time to talk in advance but I really need to get back to work."

"It's fine Dad. I have a lot of work to do too."

"Thank you Olivia, goodbye."

"Goodbye" I practically whisper as I hang up the phone. I close my eyes and sigh because I feel a little guilty about being happy that he had to leave—I didn't really want to talk to him anyway.

The next afternoon after my morning classes I walk to Professor Grant's office and I hesitate for a moment before I knock on the door. I have to build up the nerve before I can actually knock. He answers after a moment, beaming at me from inside the office and ushering me in.

He looks absolutely stunning; today he's got on a black suit and a white shirt with a silver-y grey striped tie that's accented with thin cornflower blue stripes.

"Olivia, it's good to see you." He says, pulling out a chair for me to sit in and taking my bag and setting it next to the chair like the perfect gentleman.

I'm a little confused because the Fitzgerald Grant that is taking my bag and beaming at me does not seem like the same one who teaches 8:00 AM "How To Get Away With Murder".

He sits diagonally from me at the table and motions to a few bags of food on the table. It's takeout and I notice that it is from a vegetarian restaurant and before I know it, words are spilling out of my mouth. "Are you a vegetarian?"

He smiles, "I am, you are as well, am I correct?"

I shoot him a confused look, "How did you know that?"

He laughs, "One of your extracurricular activities was Project Compassion so I made an educated guess."

I ease up in my chair, "How long have you been a vegetarian?"

He grins, "Since I was twenty."

I can't help myself. I want to pry. "You just decided to?"

He laughs, "Actually I went to a Paul McCartney concert and he gave an impassioned speech about why he was a vegetarian and looking back I can truthfully say I only started it because I was desperate to be just like Paul but I kept doing it because it's become something I truly believe in."

I can't help but smile at him.

He reciprocates my grin, "How long have you been a vegetarian?"

"Hmm…I guess officially since I was eleven but on and off throughout childhood too. My Mom was a vegetarian and she would never buy meat but my Dad bought it and cooked it and I didn't really get up the courage to tell him I wasn't going to eat any more meat until I was eleven."

"Your Mom _was_ a vegetarian?" He asks, now he's prying a bit too.

"Um, yeah she died when I was nine."

He frowns, "I'm so sorry Olivia."

I shake my head, "It was a long time ago. And please call me Liv."

"Liv," He says as if he's trying it out, "I like that. And when we're not in the classroom feel free to call me Fitz."

"Fitz." I say softly, I like the way it rolls off my tongue.

I can feel my face getting flush and thankfully Fitz changes the subject. "So Liv, what kind of law do you think you want to go into?"

I bite my lip, "I'd like to be a defense attorney. I volunteered a bit for Innocence Aid and I very much enjoyed it."

He looks up at me and finishes chewing the bite of food in his mouth before he starts to laugh, "You got certified as a paralegal and spent over forty hours a week at the office, I'd hardly call that 'volunteering a bit'."

I avert my eyes and pretend to focus on the sandwich I'm eating; I'm not good at bragging about myself.

"That was actually what drew me to your resume. As you know I pick four interns to come work for my firm and well, you are the frontrunner."

I can't help but smile and I figure I should use this opportunity to pitch myself to him in my own words. "Thank you Professor Grant—I mean, Fitz—I'd really love to work for your firm. I really admire the amount of pro-bono work you do."

He smiles, "I'm glad because as an intern the majority of the work you will be doing is the pro-bono work. I'm allowed to do more pro-bono work than most because of the high value clients I also retain, unfortunately it keeps my paralegals tied up with work for those clients and they don't have time for the pro-bono work. Which is where my interns come in and although you won't get paid for your work, you will get credit and you will get a glowing recommendation from me when you graduate. I usually only keep my interns for a year but after that I usually have no problems getting them jobs at other places. Occasionally I am able to hire an intern after the first year, if he or she proves exceedingly valuable."

I'm in the middle of a large bite of my sandwich when Fitz finishes speaking and I'm a little embarrassed as I work hard to chew it quickly.

Fitz laughs and continues speaks, "Cyrus Beene tells me that you are the best student he's ever had."

I almost choke on my food as I swallow. Cyrus always told me I was good but he never said I was the best so that's a surprise to hear.

I take a quick drink of the bottled water sitting in front of me, "You know Cyrus?"

Fitz grins, "I went to Stanford too. I was a little disappointed to learn that I wasn't the best student he'd ever had."

I can feel the color drain from my face and all of a sudden I find that I'm very nervous.

He looks at me sternly for a moment and then he laughs, "I'm just messing with you Olivia."

I smile in relief and Fitz continues to talk.

"The dean for the undergraduate law program is retiring at the end of the year and I'm trying to convince Cyrus to take the job. I think he'd be much happier out here, all that sunlight in California makes him grumpy."

I laugh, "Yeah, he's the only person I know who doesn't like the weather in California."

Fitz grins, "I do miss the California weather."

"Are you originally from there?" I ask casually.

"Yeah, Santa Barbara actually."

"Oh that's awesome, it's gorgeous down there." I reply.

"Yes it is. And I won't pretend that I didn't read your file thoroughly and ask you where you're from like a creep who is trying to make conversation. Olivia Grace Pope. Originally from Brooklyn, New York but moved to Chicago, Illinois when you were ten. Attended private day schools in the United States up until the age of eleven when you were enrolled in boarding school, first at Roedean, then transferred to Surval Montreaux at age fourteen, undergrad at Stanford where you graduated as class valedictorian, and finally on to Georgetown Law."

I avert my eyes because I feel a little embarrassed.

"Your education record is very impressive Miss Pope but what I really take stock in is your glowing recommendation from Cyrus, I've never heard him speak of a student so fondly and Cyrus is extremely hard to please. He knows greatness when he sees it and he definitely sees it in you."

I finally look up at him, he's smiling at me with a slightly crooked smile and good lord is he dreamy, I just want to lean forward and run my hand through his gorgeous hair. I want to know what his mouth feels like pressed up against mine. I want to run my hands along what I'm sure are very sturdy biceps…and I really need to stop daydreaming because I'm making this very awkward.

"Um..." I try to stutter out something coherent, "thank you very much, I do appreciate your vote of confidence and I promise I won't let you down."

He smiles, "No, I don't believe you will." And he leans back in his chair so I can no longer smell the faint aroma of whatever pleasantly odorous cologne he is wearing.

"So how often are we supposed to meet?" I ask, praying it's a lot because I definitely wouldn't hate seeing him outside the classroom like this more often.

He runs a hand through his hair and I can't help but be incredibly jealous of that hand.

"Well it depends on how often you want to meet. I know some advisors require biweekly check-ins and I know others are all right with mostly e-mail correspondence. I do prefer to actually meet with my students but I leave it up to them how frequently we meet. I'll give you my card." He fishes a wallet out of his pocket and pulls out a business card. He writes a number on the back and hands it to me. "This is my office number, it will connect you to my assistant. The number on the back is my cell phone; I'd encourage you to use it because you're more likely to get ahold of me. I do text if you're all right with texting a professor. The balls in your court on that one, if you are comfortable with texting me I'd be happy to communicate that way. It also lists my work e-mail address."

I nod my head, "I'm all right with texting. Here, I'll give you my number as well so when I text you you'll already know who it's from."

I scribble my number on a piece of paper ripped from my planner and I slide it over to him.

He looks at it and grins, "Palo Alto area code."

I laugh, "Yeah I had to get a new phone when I came back to the states because my last one was a Swiss number and it was ridiculous."

He smiles and folds the paper up, then places it into the breast pocket of his shirt.

"Do you have any questions so far about your classes or anything about the school?"

I shake my head, "No, I think I'm doing all right so far."

"That's great. Well, if you ever have any questions please don't hesitate to ask."

I stand up and toss out the trash from lunch. "Thank you so much Professor Grant for taking me on as an advisee and thank you very much for lunch."

He stands up and helps me toss out the remaining trash. "It's been my pleasure Miss Pope. I look forward to seeing you on Monday." And with that he reaches out his hand and reciprocate and again, as our hands touch there's this little jolt of electricity and I pull my hand back immediately.

"I'm sorry, I must be static-y or something."

He gives me a sort of confused look but then shrugs it off, "Not a problem Miss Pope. Have a good weekend."

I grab my things and walk out of his office, "Thank you Professor Grant, you too."

And with that I bolt down the hallway and out of the building. I quickly head for the parking lot where Abby is thankfully leaning against her car and checking something on her phone.

"Hey Abby."

She looks up at me and grins; "Hey Liv, how was your meeting with Professor Dreamy Eyes?"

I roll my eyes at her, "Shut up, he was very nice and very helpful but that was it. Hey did you know he knew Cyrus?"

Abby looks as surprised as I did when I found out, "No not at all."

"Apparently Cyrus gave me a glowing recommendation."

Abby laughs, "Well he better have, you were his best student! I hope he gave me a decent one. I want that internship position. Did he tell you anything else about it?"

I nod as we get into Abby's little Lexus. "Yeah, he said that he does quite a bit of pro-bono work and since his paralegals have to stick to the high retainer clients we will mostly be doing pro-bono work."

Abby pulls out of the parking lot. "Ugh that's awesome, I have to have that internship."

I laugh, "Well I guess that means a weekend at the law library for us."

Abby groans, "Our first week of law school and we're already going to be living in the library. This does not bode well."


	2. Chapter 2

_I have always kept an open mind, a flexibility that must go hand in hand with every form of the intelligent search for truth. _

– _Malcolm X_

* * *

Friday and Saturday go by in a blur and Abby and I have unfortunately spent most of our time at the library. That is, until Abby stands up and announces we are done for the day.

"All right everyone. It's 8 o'clock on a Saturday and we have officially been at the library for twelve hours. I realize that we need to get used to this but it's our first weekend as law school students and I also think we need to get drunk. So everyone go home, freshen up, and be at Liv's &amp; my apartment at 9. We will provide the booze if you guys can manage to bring some snacks. Everyone down with that?"

Everyone verbalizes his or her agreement and we leave the library.

Abby and I gather our things and make our way to my car. When we arrive Abby takes a moment to admire it. God Liv, I can't believe Daddy dearest gave you a 2014 Mercedes C350. Sometimes I wish I had an absentee father."

I roll my eyes at her and proceed to get in the car.

She gets in too and reaches over to put a hand on my arm, "Hey, I'm sorry Liv I didn't mean for that to sound so crass."

I smile at her, "It's okay Abs. Your crassness is one of the reasons I like you."

She grins and I recall the day we first met. It was the very first day of undergraduate school and we were doing orientation activities and had been paired into groups of about fifteen. Abby happened to be in my group and the first activity was a game involving cups – I can't even remember what it was, I just know that I was the only one who didn't know how to play – I made some apparently silly mistake and Abby looked at me and asked, 'What alien planet did you come from?' And I just stared at her blankly and said, 'Switzerland'. She laughed hysterically and we've pretty much been inseparable ever since. We ended up discovering that we lived only a few doors away in the dorms, had quite a few classes together, and basically had the same plan for our education. Abby is also my only friend to ever meet my Dad, apart from various primary school friends. She visited me in Chicago the summer after our freshman and sophomore years at school and even she has only ever said a handful of words to my father, whom she has rather un-lovingly dubbed, 'Daddy dearest'.

Abby and I get an obscene amount of alcohol and cheap plastic cups and head home. Luckily our apartment is clean, although we really haven't even had the time to make a mess, and we change clothes and get ready for our friends to show up.

10 PM rolls around and our little group is all there, Quinn, David, Harrison, Emily, Jake, Huck, and Will. I really like all of them and I think we're all going to be good friends. The internship situation could be tricky if a few of us are selected but I don't want to think about that right now.

We've turned our kitchen table into the perfect station for a flip cup tournament – its girls versus guys with Harrison as the judge – and the girls are killing the boys.

"Good lord, where did you learn to flip cup like that?" Jake asks.

Abby and I turn to each other and start laughing hysterically.

Jake is smiling at us and shaking his head, "Never mind I don't think I want to know."

"So where are you from Jake?" Abby says, using her flirting voice.

"New York City. Brooklyn, actually."

"Hey, Liv is from Brooklyn!" Abby exclaims nudging me with her elbow.

"Oh yeah, that's crazy, where did you go to high school?" He asks.

"Actually I didn't go to high school there, see I was born there and lived there until I was ten when we moved to Chicago. But I started going to boarding school when I was eleven so I still consider Brooklyn to be home."

Jake's eyes grow wide, "Boarding school, wow."

I laugh as I watch him, "Um yeah, three years in England and four in Switzerland."

He grins at me, "You're very intimidating Olivia Pope."

I purse my lips together and I try not to smile, "I'm sorry. It's not intentional."

"No, no don't apologize. I like that you're intimidating. It's sexy."

I can feel my face getting red, and I sort of scope him out casually. He's very attractive with dark brown hair and brown eyes, he's very fit and he has sexy stubble around his mouth.

Unfortunately that's when Abby accidentally spills a pitcher of beer all over the table and I jump out of the way but some still gets on my pants. I look up and I see that Jake has some on his pants as well.

"I'm _so sorry_ guys!" Abby exclaims.

I can't help but laugh at her—she's totally wasted.

"Hey if you want to follow me to the bathroom I can help you get that out?"

He grins at me, "Yeah, sure."

I lead the way to the bathroom and run the water so it's mildly warm and grab a washcloth from the cabinet.

I hand it to Jake and our hands touch lightly but there's no spark. Suddenly I'm reminded of the spark I felt with Professor Grant. Jake isn't quite as attractive as Professor Grant but he is still very handsome and I really need to stop thinking about Professor Grant – Fitz – I even sigh when I simply _think_ about his name.

"So, um, where did you go to undergrad?" I ask as I attempt to get the beer out of my pants.

He looks up at me and smiles, "I went to UNC. You and Abby went to Stanford, right?"

I nod my head, "Did you like UNC?"

"I did. I liked North Carolina, it was completely different than Brooklyn."

I grin, "Yeah that's not surprising."

"So were you in boarding school in London?"

"I wish. I was south of London in Brighton, along the English Channel."

"Wow, what about Switzerland? The only place I've ever been in Switzerland is Geneva, were you anywhere around there?"

I grin, "I was in Montreaux, which is on the exact opposite side of Lake Geneva as the city of Geneva."

Jake grins at me, "Sorry my knowledge of geography is not the best."

I laugh, "You're doing better than most."

"You missed a spot on your shirt." I say quietly.

He leans backward to look and I reach my hands forward to help him with the stain.

"Thanks Liv." He says quietly.

I nod my head, "Yeah, no problem."

We are then interrupted by a knock at the door and I jump back.

Jake laughs, "We'll be right out."

I throw the washcloths in the hamper and Jake and I make our way out of the bathroom.

Later that night after everyone is gone, Abby and I are getting ready in the bathroom and we are talking.

"So Jake's cute." Abby says casually.

I shrug, "Yeah, he's nice."

Abby shakes her head and laughs at me. "Liv, I greatly admire your self-control."

I roll my eyes at her and we both head to bed.

We spend most of Sunday working on our defenses and other homework we've been assigned during the week and therefore Monday comes early. Sadly I don't have any interesting interaction with Fitz on Monday, Tuesday goes by quickly, and even Wednesday soars by after we turn in our defenses. I am a little grumpy that I haven't really had the chance to talk to Fitz, I don't know why, I feel ridiculous acting like this but I can't help it so I am pleasantly surprised when I am lying in bed reading and I receive a text message. I lift up my phone and I am elated when I read the name on the message 'Fitzgerald Grant'. I can't stop the grin from appearing on my face as I open it up to read the message.

_I know I said the ball was in your court in regards to texting so I hope I'm not overstepping any boundaries here. I finished reading your defense and I thought it was rude to call this late. Could you meet me tomorrow to discuss your proposal?  
Fitzgerald Grant_

I bite my lip, I was confident in my proposal when I handed it in but now I'm a little worried. I try to shake it off. I do like that he signed his whole name, probably just in case I hadn't put him in my contacts yet.

_You're not overstepping any boundaries; I appreciate your willingness to discuss my work. I am free anytime after lunch tomorrow to meet. Thank you, Liv_

Almost immediately he responds back.

_Does tomorrow at 5 o'clock work for you?_

_Absolutely. Your office?_

_Actually, if you wouldn't mind meeting me at my law firm I'd greatly appreciate it. The address is on the business card I gave you. It's not too far away from campus._

_Of course, I will be there at 5. Thank you so much Professor Grant._

_Thank you for being accommodating. I look forward to our meeting tomorrow. And remember; outside of class its just Fitz._

I can't help but grin at that last message. He looks forward to meeting with me! I won't be able to sleep now because I'm so giddy, even though that's ridiculous because I'm sure he's just being polite.

Thursday comes and I find myself staring at my watch all day practically willing it to be 5 o'clock. Finally, at four thirty I can't wait anymore. I stand up and assess myself in the mirror. I've put on a pair of white pants, a black blouse, and my favorite black and white cropped blazer. My hair is softly curled and I've accented the outfit very simply with my favorite watch and a thin pearl necklace I inherited from my mother. I've completed the outfit with a pair of smart black pumps and my favorite white leather bag. I grab my keys and I am out the door.

I arrive at his law firm less than ten minutes later and realize that I am still more than fifteen minutes early. I don't want to be a bother because I'm sure he's busy, so I wait five minutes to walk into the building.

I enter the law firm and I am immediately impressed. It's a beautiful building with gorgeous mahogany wood accents and green armchairs. Everything about it is warm and inviting and I assume that's on purpose to get potential clients feeling as comfortable as possible.

I walk up to the front desk and tell the woman sitting at it that I am here to see Fitzgerald Grant. She points me down a hallway and instructs me that Fitz's office is all the way down and on the right.

I walk down the hallway past the other offices and I finally arrive at Fitz's. All the doors are glass and every office has floor to ceiling windows in front of it so you can see everyone in their offices.

I walk by Fitz's and see that he's on the phone but before I can do anything he sees me and he's waving me into his office.

He gets up and motions for me to sit down in one of the chairs across from his desk and he covers the mouthpiece with his hand and mouths 'I'm sorry'.

I smile and shake my head; it's really no big deal.

He spends a few minutes talking and that gives me an opportunity to scope out his office. It's a large office that matches the tone of the rest of the firm, warm and comforting. There is a large window behind his desk that features an impressive view of Washington, D.C. He has his degree and several accolades hung on the wall but he also has several pictures of landscapes—I think they're Hawaii. On his desk I spot a picture of him with an older woman I assume is his mother, one of him and several guys on what I assume was some sort of guys trip to Vegas, and one more that I'm surprised to see features him and Cyrus.

I'm glad there are no pictures of women around here. I feel silly thinking that but I can't help it. I know he's not married and I'm hoping this means that he doesn't have a significant other in his life either.

He hangs up the phone and focuses his attention on me. "I apologize for that. Gotta keep the clients happy."

I smile, "No it was no problem. I'm early so I apologize for that."

He grins, "What do you think of the office?"

"It's gorgeous. Very large, I didn't expect it to be quite so large."

"We're actually in the process of expanding to the floor above us. Should be an exciting expansion. Room for lots of new employees."

I'm not sure if he's hinting at anything here but I really hope he is.

He abruptly claps his hands together and reaches below his desk to grab something—it's my paper. He then sets it on the desk in front of me.

From what I can see there are no marks on it so I don't know whether to be nervous or happy.

"You know every person in that class gave me a cookie cutter defense with an added twist. There were lots of proposals suggesting I defend it like an accident or as an insanity case. There were lots of proposals suggesting I chalk it up to PTSD. I did find your friend Abby—is that her name?—I did find her proposal about reasonable mistake fairly interesting. But yours Miss Pope was the only proposal I received that suggested the proper defense was simply proving that Mr. Burton didn't commit the crime."

I nod my head; I'm not really sure how he wants me to respond.

"I'd like you to explain your proposal to me. Not this detailed obviously but I want to hear it straight from your mouth."

He leans back in his chair and puts his hands behind his head.

I somehow manage to close my mouth and when I attempt to speak I'm shocked that words actually come out.

"I proposed we defend him as innocent because I believe he is innocent. The accused, James Burton, an ex Army Ranger who suffered major PTSD due to a traumatic brain injury he suffered in Iraq. I get why they would think he did it. There have been cases of soldiers coming home and hurting those they love because they can't adapt and because it's hard to assess what can become a trigger to a person with PTSD, but I don't believe this is one of them. I think that even though he was having trouble controlling his emotions and controlling his outbursts, I do not believe the escalation to murder is something that was plausible. That extreme of an escalation doesn't make sense, although they'd fought before and he admitted to breaking a few things around the house, he'd never laid a hand on her. That type of escalation just doesn't make sense. I believe in order to prove Mr. Burton innocent we have to find the real killer. Sophie Williams was for all accounts a completely normal person. She was the kind of person everyone liked, the kind of person who would support her boyfriend through anything. But I think that she may have had something to hide, something maybe from before she met Mr. Burton. Someone was very angry with her; it takes a lot of rage to stab someone twelve times. I think the real murderer is still out there and I think we need to find him."

Fitz is still staring at me as he leans forward on his desk. "I agree Miss Pope."

I let out a deep breath I wasn't even aware I was holding in.

"I haven't chosen the three other students yet but I am one hundred percent positive that I want you working for me. So, Miss Pope, I am officially extending to you an invitation to work for me, are you interested?"

My eyes grow wide, "Absolutely!" I exclaim, "Thank you so much Professor Grant, I promise I'll work harder than anyone."

He grins, "I have no doubts about that. Would you like to see your office?"

"Yes, please!"

He laughs and gets up out of his chair. He opens the door to his office and like a gentleman, he ushers me out first. We walk straight across the hall to a large office with four desks in it.

"This will be your office, you'll be sharing it with the three other students I choose from class. I'll have decided who those three will be by tomorrow afternoon. I let you all choose your hours but in order to get credit from the university you have to log at least twenty hours a week. You're welcome to do more than that obviously, but twenty is the minimum. I just ask that once you figure out your hours you give them to me so I know when you'll be in the office and can have work ready for you."

"Well, I only have class Monday through Thursday and I am done before lunch so what about 1 PM to 5 PM Monday through Thursday and 8 to 5 on Friday?"

Fitz grins, "You're very eager. I like that."

I can feel my face get flush.

"Well, I suppose I should let you get back to your studies. Thank you for stopping by Olivia and I look forward to working this case with you." He says as he reaches out to shake my hand.

I take his hand in mine and I swear that spark is still there, "Thank you Fitz. I'm looking forward to it as well."

I arrive home and Abby is sitting on the sofa flipping through channels on the tv when she hears me walk in.

"Hey Liv, where have you been? I'm starving, lets go get some dinner?"

She then turns around to look at me. "Whoa, you're not so much business cas as business fab! Where have you been."

I can't help it when I start jumping up and down where I stand. "I got the internship!" I exclaim excitedly.

Abby jumps up off the sofa and hugs me. "Oh my god Liv congratulations!"

I hug her back and then we go sit down on the sofa.

"So, did he happen to mention who else he picked?" She inquires casually.

I laugh, "He said that he hasn't picked yet but the other three will know by tomorrow. But he did mention you by name when he was telling me that. He said he found your theory very interesting so hopefully that means he'll pick you too!"

Abby squeals, "Ahh you mean it? You're not just trying to placate me?"

I laugh, "Absolutely not."

She grins, "Oh my god Liv us working together at Cabot, Rabb &amp; Hotchner, it's going to be so great! And talk about the amazing boost to our resumes!"

I grin, she's totally right. This internship could be the start of big things for us.


	3. Chapter 3

_The seasons of transformation are upon us. _

_– Michael Teal_

* * *

It's Friday morning and I planned to sleep in a little bit but that plan is ruined when Abby bursts into my room around 8:15.

"Liv Liv Liv, I'm freaking out!" She exclaims as she jumps on my bed.

I just groan until she shakes me, "Come on Liv wake up! I've been up since 6 because I'm so anxious about this internship. It's so not fair Grant told you early." She says pouting.

I turn around to face her and sigh, "So this is my punishment, I get to wait with you?"

She grins wickedly, "Yes, you're the one who told me we would know by this afternoon you are going to wait anxiously with me!"

And with that she grabs my tv remote and flips it on to find something she wants to watch.

"So he told you he would let the others he picked know by this afternoon right?"

I yawn, "Yeah that's what he said."

"Well what do you think afternoon means? Like lunchtime? But maybe he eats lunch late so that could mean 1 or he could eat lunch early so maybe he means like 11. Liv I'm freaking out!"

I roll my eyes and sit up. "Abby, I'm sure you'll know in a couple hours. Just relax."

Now she rolls her eyes at me, "Easy for you to say, Grant's so impressed with you he's practically offered you a full-time position at his firm."

"Oh my god Abby, shut up. Let's go get some breakfast so you can think about something else."

She nods her head in agreement and we both get up and head out to the kitchen.

We make ourselves some pancakes for breakfast and I convince her that we should start on our other homework.

By 11:30 she's freaking out a little bit. "Liv, what if he doesn't pick me?"

I look up from my pile of books and sigh, "Abby, chill out he's going to pick you."

She stands up, "But what if he doesn't? Then I'm just going to be pacing around our kitchen all day waiting for an e-mail that's never going to come!"

"Oh, Abby don't worry that would never happen. I'm sure we'd find out who got the positions before that happened."

She glares at me and I can't help but stifle a laugh. "Sorry, I couldn't help myself. But seriously Abby I'm sure you'll get it."

As if on cue her e-mail dings and she races back to the table. She scans the e-mail for a minute and then starts jumping up and down. "I GOT IT I GOT IT!" She's screaming.

I join her in her celebration and we both start dancing around the kitchen.

"Wait, wait, we need music!" She exclaims as she leans over her computer and switches on one of our favorite songs and one that seems perfectly suited to this moment in time, "Burn" by Ellie Goulding.

We are interrupted when my phone starts to ring. I look down and see that it's Jake. Abby turns the volume down and I pick it up and put it on speakerphone.

"Hey Jake, what's up?" I ask casually.

"Hey Liv, I uh, sorry I just wanted to call and say that Grant picked me for one of the intern positions."

I smile, "That's great Jake! Abby and I will be joining you!"

"That's awesome!" He replies. "I mean, that's kind of why I called you. I don't want you to think I was bragging about being picked or anything I just figured if I got picked then you were definitely picked so I thought I'd call."

I laugh as he stutters out his thought. "Don't worry, I didn't think you were bragging."

All of a sudden Abby gets a text and picks up her phone. "David is number four!" She mouths.

"So do you know who got the last spot?" Jake asks.

"Yeah, actually we just figured that out. It's David."

Jake laughs, "Yeah that makes sense since he's Grant's other advisee."

There's a pause in the conversation like we both don't really know what to say.

Thankfully Jake speaks first. "Well, I'm glad I'll get to work with you. Maybe we can go out tonight or tomorrow to celebrate?"

"Um, yeah that sounds really good. I'll talk to you later."

"Bye Liv."

"Bye Jake."

When I hang up the phone Abby is staring at me with crazy eyes.

"What?" I ask, attempting to be casual.

She rolls her eyes at me, "He likes you! And he's hot. You should hit that."

I blush and turn away from her. "Abby I'm not interested in him like that. Plus we just got this internship, we are not going to have any time for dating."

Abby laughs and places her hand on my shoulder, "Oh my dear sweet innocent Livia, I wasn't talking about dating."

I roll my eyes at her and hit the volume button on her computer so I can just keep dancing.

Abby and I spend Friday doing our homework but we decide to go out for drinks on Saturday with some of the gang. Luckily the others aren't too sore about not being picked—there are hundreds of internship opportunities in DC—so we all have a good night. Around 12 I find that I'm pretty drunk so I get a glass of water and find a table in the back corner.

Suddenly I see Jake walking over to me.

"Hey Liv!" He says, waving to me and then hurrying over. He sits next to me and he's got a big grin on his face.

I shoot him a confused look, "Hey Jake."

He just keeps grinning at me, "I've been looking for you."

I nod my head, "Well, you found me."

He laughs, "Yeah I did. I…um…I just wanted to tell you that you look beautiful tonight. Actually you look beautiful all the time."

I can't help it when I start to laugh. Jake is looking at me with total confusion and I cover my mouth with my hand. "I'm so sorry, I'm not laughing at what you said, just the situation. You know, boy hits on girl in bar, cheesy things happen. Sorry, I hate rom-coms and Abby is always making me watch them.

Thankfully he laughs, "Well, that is an unexpected reaction but I guess I'll take it. Uh, do you want to get out of here?"

I look over at Abby who is dancing the night away with both Harrison and Will and I look back at Jake. "Yeah, sure. Want to go to my apartment?"

He nods his head, "Yeah definitely." I gather my things and head over to Abby and whisper that I am heading home. And Abby, just being Abby, decides to scream, "Get it girl!" And hugs me as I walk out the door.

Our apartment is just around the block so we walk back there in slightly awkward silence.

We get to my apartment and I let us in. I toss my clutch on the kitchen table and grab Jake's hand and lead him into the living room.

I don't say anything, honestly I wouldn't know what to say even if I wanted to speak, I just fall backward onto the sofa and pull Jake with me. Our lips crash together and we just lie there kissing for a few minutes until Jake pulls back.

"Whoa Liv, we're making out?"

I laugh, "Well we _were_."

He smiles and runs a hand through my hair. "Is this okay?"

I roll my eyes, "Yes. It's okay." And I start to kiss him again before I pull back dramatically. "We're not having sex. Just thought I should clarify that in case you thought this was going to go any farther than us making out."

Jake looks at me as if he's a little confused by my outburst but nods his head. "Yeah, of course Liv."

We continue making out for a little while. It's nice. Jake is a good kisser but I'm not sure I feel anything with him.

I've only ever had one boyfriend. Well, I guess I've had two if you count Graham Eastman when I was six. But the only real boyfriend I ever had was a boy named Gio I met when I was 14 and moved to Switzerland. He was from Valencia, Spain and he went to my school's boy's school counterpart.

We just kiss on the sofa until Abby bursts into the apartment and I jump up. Of course she knows what was going on.

"Hey Liv, hey Jake, enjoying some hanky panky on the sofa?" She says laughing.

I roll my eyes. "Go to bed Abby."

She tosses her purse across the room. "I do need to go to bed. I'm wasted." And with that she makes her way into the bathroom.

I look over at Jake and we both burst out laughing. After I catch my breath I reach my hand down and help Jake stand up.

"I don't do sleepovers either. I like to play using middle school rules."

He laughs, "You made out like that as a middle schooler?"

I roll my eyes, "You know what I mean."

He grins, "Yeah. Well, thanks for having me over. It was very nice. Maybe we can do it again sometime?"

I shrug my shoulders, "Eh, maybe."

He feigns offense, "Ouch. You wound me Liv." He says as he places his hand over his chest in a dramatic gesture.

We walk over to the front door and he leans in to kiss me lightly on the cheek. "Goodnight Liv."

I smile, "Goodnight Jake."

I see him out and I head back into the apartment and into my bedroom to find Abby sitting on my bed. Her eyes are wide, "Olivia Grace Pope, I never would have expected you to be the one to christen our new sofa!"

I roll my eyes and sit next to Abby on my bed. "We just made out. I'm not having sex with him. He's nice but I don't know if I feel a connection with him."

Abby rolls her eyes, "Liv, real life doesn't always work like that. You have to work to have a connection with someone. He's a good guy and I think you should give him a chance."

I sigh, "You're right. I will give him a chance but I'm not promising anything and I'm definitely not going to sleep with him until I do feel something."

She smiles at me, "That's good Liv. You have to give yourself a chance to feel something. And I know I give you a lot of grief for it, but I'm proud of you for sticking to your guns about this sex thing. I really admire that about you."

I lean in and hug her. I can't help but laugh because she reeks of booze. I lean back and stand up. "Thanks. I love you boozy, now go to bed."

She gets up and heads out of my room, "Goodnight Liv. Love you too."

Sunday goes by quickly, we just focus on studying and plan our outfits for our first day at our internships.

Monday morning goes by quickly and Abby and I wolf down our lunches so we can go back to the apartment and get ready.

Abby has chosen to wear a long black pencil skirt, classic black Manolo Mary Janes, a cobalt blue blouse, her outfit is accented with silver jewelry and her long red hair is perfectly straightened.

I have chosen to wear a champagne colored pantsuit with a white blouse, I've accessorized with a thick strand of pearls and two thin ones I inherited from my Mom, I'm wearing a pair of white pumps and I've styled my hair the same way Abby has, perfectly straight.

We leave the house and head to the firm. Abby and I are the first two there and the girl at the front desk instructs us to wait there for Fitz. Jake and David show up together a few minutes after us and they sit down with us.

I haven't talked to Jake since I sent him home on Saturday night so I blush a little when I see him.

He sees me and immediately walks over and sits next to me. "Hey Liv, how are you?"

I smile, "I'm doing well Jake, how are you?"

"Nervous." He says.

"Me too." I respond with a laugh, but I'm not really nervous, I'm more excited. But I also remember that Abby is the only one who knows I've already been to the office so I should probably act like this is all new to me.

It's then when out of the corner of my eye I spot Fitz walking down the hallway and as much as I try to hide it, I know Jake sees my eyes light up.

Fitz is grinning as he walks toward us. We all stand up to greet him. "Ah, my interns!" He says enthusiastically. "Welcome to Cabot, Rabb, and Hotchner and please follow me."

Abby is the first to jump in line behind him; I know she's beyond excited to be here. We all follow him as he leads us to our offices. They are slightly different from when I saw them, basically in that when I was here last time the desks were empty and now there are papers stacked high on each desk and new filing cabinets have appeared.

"All right, this will be your office for the year. You should have everything you need in here. My paralegals have brought in case law that might help you and your computers all have access to LexusNexus. But feel free to use our little mini law library. It's down the hall, you can work in there if you wish or you can work in here. I gave you the more pertinent witness statements and reports about this case to read when you made your proposals but I would like you to go through everything. I've printed out copies of everything and they are on your desk. You can take today to read them, if you don't finish them feel free to take them home but do remember to keep them to yourselves. My office is across the hall; if you need anything please don't be afraid to ask me, or anyone in the office for that matter. I do need all of your schedules by this afternoon. You all now have e-mail addresses with the firm, the long is information is on your desks, so just log onto them and shoot me your schedules before you leave today. I'll be in tomorrow to discuss the case with you all so please try to get through as much as possible today."

Just as he is about to walk out of the office he pops his head back in, "Oh Olivia could I see you in my office for a moment?" He ducks his head out before I can respond and I turn to look at Abby before I follow him and her eyes are wide with excitement. She shrugs and motions me out the door. I glance at Jake before I walk out of the office and he looks a little annoyed but I just ignore it and I head over to Fitz's office.

I smile at him when I walk in and he smiles back. I have to steady myself on a chair because his smile is so gorgeous that I find myself going weak in the knees.

"Liv, how are you?" He asks kindly.

"I'm doing very well, excited to be here. How are you?"

He grins, "Excellent, I'm excited you're here too."

I don't even know how to respond, I just smile at him.

"So I have a special assignment for you, once you're done reading the case file that is, but I recently came into some classified information from a friend of mine at the Bureau and she may have indicated that Sophie Williams may have a connection to a case she has been working on."

"Wait a minute, by the 'Bureau' do you mean the FBI?" I ask, totally intrigued.

He nods his yes, "Yes, that Bureau. Agent Jareau can only meet tomorrow and I'm totally swamped but she has agreed to meet with you, that is if you're up for it?"

My mouth drops open, "Oh my gosh yes of course I'm up for it!" I exclaim.

He grins and grabs a file from his desk. "I figured. Here's all the information. You can let the others know about the meeting if you wish but the information I'm giving you is for your eyes only until we get some kind of confirmation but I trust you."

I can't keep my mouth shut, "Why do you trust me? I mean, I appreciate it, but you don't really know me."

He shrugs, "Call it a gut feeling. I don't think you'll let me down."

I smile and take the file from him. "Thank you. I'll try my hardest not to."

I walk back to our office and Jake practically jumps up from his chair. "What did he want?" He pries.

I sit down at my desk and Jake follows me over, sitting on the edge. I shrug, "Not much, he just had some advisee stuff I asked for last week that he was getting to me."

Jake frowns but I think he believes me. I take one of the witness statements off my desk so I can start reading but Jake is still sitting there.

"So I was wondering if maybe I could take you out to dinner on Friday night?"

I smile politely, "Um, yeah that sounds good."

He grins, "Awesome." And thankfully he goes back to his own desk to work.

At five we are all getting ready to head home for the night when I get an e-mail from Fitz asking me to come into his office.

He has taken his tie off and has the top button of his dress shirt unbuttoned and he looks so smoking hot, there are literally no better words to describe him than smoking hot because that's what he is.

"I confirmed your meeting with JJ tomorrow. Agent Jennifer Jareau is her name, she goes by JJ, I've written the address of your meet location and her contact information down here. Don't be nervous Liv, you'll do great."

I take the paper from him and I can't stop myself from smiling, "Thank you. I really hope so."

"Are you heading home for the night?" I ask him.

He shakes his head, "No, I've got a bit more work to do here but have a good night."

"Thanks. Don't work too hard."

He flashes that gorgeous smile at me once again, "I'll try. Don't study too hard."

"I'll try." I say as I walk out the door.

Abby and I head home and she somehow manages to wait until we've walked in the door of our apartment to ask me what Fitz gave me earlier.

"So what the heck did he want to talk to you about? Come on Liv, you can't leave me hanging like that?" She exclaims as she starts to raid the refrigerator for dinner.

"I can't give you details until I confirm them tomorrow and you have to keep this to yourself, promise?"

Abby turns around to look at me and places her hand over her heart. "I swear on George Clooney."

I laugh, that's how we know the other is dead serious. We found out early on in our friendship that we were both huge fans of George Clooney.

"Okay, I'm meeting with an FBI agent tomorrow to ask her about some leads Fitz has on the case."

Abby slams her palm against the kitchen table. "Are you fucking serious?! That is amazing! Oh my god this case is getting better by the minute!"

I laugh, "Don't tell anyone I told you. I'm supposed to get the information and go through it with Fitz before we decide if it's valid or not."

Abby turns back to the refrigerator and starts rummaging around again. I head over to the cabinets and start to do the same.

"So have you figured out Fitz's deal with you yet?"

I pause, "What do you mean his 'deal' with me?"

"Oh come on, like you haven't noticed?"

I turn around so I can see her, "Um, what the hell are you talking about?"

She turns around with a stack of food and sets it down on the table before she gives me a big, dramatic eye roll.

"Come on Liv, don't be naïve. I get that on paper you're Mary freakin' Poppins but", she pauses when I give her a confused look, "you know Mary Poppins, 'practically perfect in every way'."

I can't help myself when I burst out laughing but Abby just continues to talk. "But David is almost as perfect on paper as you and Fitz is not taking the same time to help him. I mean the guy told you personally that you got the internship spot. He's giving you special assignments and we've only been on the job one day. Even in class I catch him staring at you. Liv, the man is doing everything but drooling over you, he wants you."

I don't even know how to respond so I just stand there for a few moments. I feel like I should just deny all of this vehemently but I can't bring myself to do it. Instead I just sit down at the table and lay my head down on it.

"Abby you can't say that."

She laughs, "Why? It's true!"

I groan, "No Abby it can't be. He is so dreamy and I am so attracted to him and you have to stop getting my hopes up like that because it's never going to happen."

She sits down beside me. "Whoa Liv, you actually really like him?"

I prop my head up with my hand. "He's so nice to me and encouraging and he's so smart and I hate to sound shallow but I have to say it again, he is so damn dreamy!"

Abby laughs, "Liv, I'm not trying to get your hopes up. I legitimately believe he's into you."

I sigh, "Even if he was there's really nothing I can do about it, I mean he's our teacher and he's my advisor. That would be something that could get him fired and me kicked out of school and I can't risk that."

Abby frowns, "Yeah, that's true. Damn. Well…um…Jake seems to be pretty smitten with you?"

I sigh, "Yeah, he's nice. He asked me to dinner on Friday."

"That's great Liv! You need to go on a date, just focus on that and you'll be fine!"

I get up and grab the food she's set out on the table.

"I hope so. It would be great to not feel so nervous around Fitz."

Abby laughs, "You'll get over that eventually."

The next day I find I'm pretty nervous. My morning classes go by quickly and my one o'clock meeting with Agent Jareau is getting closer and closer. I dress in my work clothes and I just pick at my lunch because I'm getting anxious. A little before I'm going to leave I get a text from Fitz.

_Good luck this afternoon. Don't be nervous, JJ is great and so are you._

I practically melt when I read it and quickly send him a quick 'thank you' text and head out.

I get to the little coffee shop where I'm meeting this agent and I arrive about ten minutes early so I get a table myself. Fitz sent me an e-mail describing the agent I'm meeting but I hope she knows she's looking for me as well because there are a lot of blonde women here. But then I see a professional looking woman walk into the café. She grabs a coffee quickly and then heads in my direction. I'm pretty sure she's the one I'm meeting with and thankfully she must know I'm the one she's meeting because she heads right over to me.

She sits down across from me and she reaches over to shake my hand. "I'm Jennifer Jareau, you can call me JJ though. You must be Olivia?"

I smile and shake her hand, "Yes, you can call me Liv, it's very nice to meet you."

She smiles at me and pulls a file out of her bag. "This is everything I found." She lowers her voice, "She is definitely not with the Bureau but we are almost positive she is or was with a Homeland Security agency. When we ran her though facial recognition software we got several hits but nothing connected to anything within the Bureau. But from the pattern we've deduced that she's definitely not just a civilian."

There's a lump in my throat but somehow I manage to speak in a very soft voice, "So, you're telling me you think she's CIA?"

JJ nods her head slowly confirming my suspicions and I take a deep breath because this case just got a lot more complicated.


	4. Chapter 4

_People grow through experience if they meet life honestly and courageously. This is how character is built._

– _Eleanor Roosevelt_

* * *

After my meeting with JJ I rush back to the office as fast as I possibly can. I barrel down the hallway and I'm sure I look like a nut but I don't really care because I'm so overwhelmed by all the information JJ gave me. I definitely was not expecting for the case to take this kind of a twist and I don't think Fitz was either.

I rush to his office and I have to remind myself to knock so I don't just barge in.

I pause, knock, and pop my head in, "Fitz?"

He looks up from whatever he's working on and he smiles at me, "Liv, it's great to see you. How did your meeting go?" He says as he motions for me to sit down.

I shut the door and take a seat across from him and I reach into my bag to grab the file JJ gave me. I open it and spread the photos across his desk. He looks a little baffled once he takes a look at them.

"Fitz", I say, "JJ thinks she's CIA."

Fitz's eyes grow wide and he leans back into his chair. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs, "Fuck." He says quietly. He then grabs the photos and motions for me to follow him out of the office. He leads me up a flight of stairs, through a doorway, and down a small hallway to two rooms that are locked by keypads on the doors.

He punches a number into the one on the right and opens the door. The room has two computers, a bunch of law books, a large conference table, two cozy chairs, a large bulletin board, and a whiteboard.

Fitz shuts the door behind us and turns to me. "For now this has to stay between us. CIA involvement can get…tricky. I'm going to need you to keep this to yourself for the time being and anytime you work on anything CIA related, you need to work in here. The code for the door is 180642. These computers have restricted access and are secure servers separate form the rest of the firm so that the information is more protected. And Olivia, if any of this makes you uncomfortable please tell me. I do not want you doing anything you're uneasy about."

I smile, "Thank you but I promise I'll be all right. I want to work on this. I want to help as much as I can."

He smiles back at me and I could just melt where I stand, "You're a gem Olivia. Well, what do you say we get to work?"

I nod and we both sit down and start going through the information JJ has given me.

I explain the intel JJ has come across. Sophie Williams has been seen at several different US military operations bases in the Middle East. The FBI hasn't had any contact with her and they aren't positive she was CIA but JJ's contacts at Homeland Security know who she is, they just can't confirm or deny anything except that she is definitely American Intelligence.

"So how do we get more information?" I ask after we've gone over JJ's intel.

Fitz sighs, "Unfortunately we have to go into the belly of the beast."

I look up at him, totally confused.

"We have to go to Langley."

My eyes light up, "Are you serious? Do I get to go?"

He smiles, "Absolutely. I'm going to set up a meeting with a contact I have and hopefully we can get in before the end of the week."

He gets up to walk out of the office but pauses before he leaves, "You remember the code?"

I grin, "180642. Paul McCartney's birthday."

He bursts out laughing, "Five years and I've finally been caught. You continuously surprise me Miss Pope. Not many people can do that."

I know I'm blushing but I somehow manage to eek out a response, "Don't worry, your secret is safe with me."

He grins, "I'm going to head out to make this call but I'll be back. I shouldn't be too long but in case I get interrupted or pulled away please don't be afraid to just barge into my office and ask. You're a welcome interruption."

My cheeks get hot and I just nod my head because I don't know how to respond to Fitz in a way that's not going to totally embarrass me.

He leaves the room and I scan over the information and decide I need to grab some coffee and drop my things off in my office before I get started. I should also check in with Abby, I'm sure she's wondering where I've disappeared.

I wander back down to our shared office and when I walk in the door Jake sees me first and immediately jumps up.

"Hey Liv! Where have you been?"

I smile and put my things on my desk. "Fitz gave me a couple extra things to do. I'm just stopping in to put my things down and check in with Abby. Is she around?" I say as I notice Abby isn't in the room.

"She's down the hall making copies of some case files. So what are you working on?"

"Um, it's not a big deal but it's also not something I can talk about."

Jake frowns, "Aren't you working on the Burton case with us?"

I nod, "Yeah, I am I just came across some information that needs to stay confidential until we can decide how to use it."

"So I guess Grant's making you keep quiet." He says with an eye roll.

I glare at him; "He's not the one making me keep it quiet. It's a legal issue. Just drop it please, you'll find out soon enough."

He sighs and backs off because he can see I'm getting angry. "Okay. Sorry Liv. Um, you want to study tonight?"

I bite my lip, "Well Abby and I were planning on studying and breaking to watch NCIS: LA, but if you want to join you're welcome to?"

He smiles, "Yeah, that would be great. How about I bring us all dinner?"

I shake my head, "No, you don't have to do that."

He objects, "No Liv, I insist. Really, its no problem."

I sigh and then smile, "Okay, thank you. Is 6:30 all right with you?"

He grins, "Definitely. I can't wait."

I nod and give him a small smile before heading out of the office to find Abby. I head down to the copy room and I find Abby sitting on the counter eating a croissant and I can't help but laugh at the sight before me.

"Hey Liv!" She says between bites of her croissant."

I laugh as pieces of croissant fly out of her mouth and don't phase her one bit.

"So what are you copying?"

Her eyes light up, "Oh! I just found some interesting case law that I thought we could use so I compiled it all together and now I'm making copies for everyone."

"Sounds good Abs."

"So how did your meeting go?" She asks quietly.

I shrug and look toward the door to make sure no one is walking by and then I respond softly, "I'm not supposed to talk about it just yet. But I promise you'll know soon enough."

Abby pouts, "You're really going to make me wait for this?"

"I swear, I'm only making you wait because it's really important and I want Fitz to trust me."

Abby starts grinning, "Yeah, how's the boss man doing today?"

I sigh, "We are _not _talking about this here."

"Later tonight then?" She says, a wicked grin on her face.

I roll my eyes, "Yeah…oh wait, no we can't. I invited Jake to come study and watch NCIS: LA with us. He's bringing over dinner too."

Abby's eyes grow wide, "Wow, hanging out on a Tuesday night. Might Olivia Pope actually like a boy?"

I roll my eyes again, "Abby come on, we're going to eat, study, and watch NCIS:LA, and you will be there. He's just a friend."

Abby scoffs, "Yeah, a friend who had his tongue down your throat a couple days ago!"

I pretend to be angry with her, "And now I'm leaving!"

She starts to laugh and jumps off the counter, "No, Liv I swear I'll be nice! Stay here and talk to me!"

She grabs my arm and I turn around, "Fine, fine I _guess_ I'll stay." I tease.

"How about I tell you about me and Will last night at the law library?"

My eyes get wide, "What? You _already_ had a dirty hookup at the law library? Oh my god!"

Abby shrugs, "Well, you had left for the night and I needed to de-stress." She wiggles her eyebrows and we both burst out laughing.

The rest of the day is uneventful, I research in my little secret room and unfortunately Fitz is on the phone most of the day so he doesn't get to come back up and help me but he does check on me every so often which I realize is something I've started to look forward to and makes me feel kind of pathetic.

We head home at the end of the night and immediately start doing our homework. We don't have too much tonight which is nice considering how busy we've been with work for the case.

I hear a knocking at our door and I look down at my watch, it's just now 6:30. Jake is right on time.

I get up to answer the door and I open it to find Jake on the other side. He's got two bags of Chinese food in his hands and his backpack in the other. He looks really good. He's wearing a grey t-shirt and fitted jeans and he's sporting a little scruff.

I smile, "Hey, welcome."

He grins back, "Thanks Liv, you look adorable."

I laugh and start to blush; I'm wearing Stanford shorts and a loose fitting Star Trek sweatshirt. "Um, thanks it's a guilty pleasure."

"I think it's cute."

I look away in embarrassment, "Um, why don't you come in?"

Jake walks in and greets Abby. We set the food out and start to eat while we study. Once 9:45 comes around we are all pretty beat and Abby announces it's time to get ready to watch NCIS: LA.

We head out to the living room and Abby makes herself cozy in a chair and I plop down on the edge of the sofa so I can cozy up to the armrest.

Jake sits right next to me and puts his arm around me. I'm not sure how to respond to it at first so I stay curled up next to the armrest.

Jake starts to speak, "So are you guys really into this show?"

Abby turns to face us and nods her head furiously, "Ohhh yeah! This show has been Liv and my thing since it first started. I just _love_ Deeks."

Jake laughs, "Deeks, really?"

Now I start to laugh, "Oh yeah, Abby is a California girl through and through. She _loves_ her surfer boys! Do you actually watch this show?"

Jake nods, "Yeah, I like it. So Liv, do you like Deeks?"

Abby starts to laugh, "Duh, she's not insane! But Liv is definitely more into Callen."

Jake looks oddly happy at this statement, "So you're more into the clean cut yet still sort of scruffy look?"

I bite my lip; I know he's happy about that because he has a similar style. But before I can respond Abby starts to laugh. "Yeah, there's that and there's also the fact that Liv always has a crush on older guys."

I can feel my cheeks get hot, "Just because I like celebrities like Chris O'Donnell and George Clooney doesn't mean I always have crushes on older guys!"

Abby shoots me a knowing look and thank god she stays silent instead of choosing to bring up my little Fitz crush in front of Jake.

Suddenly the show starts and I'm more than grateful because that means our conversation is quickly forgotten.

Somehow during the coarse of the show I wind up closer and closer to Jake and his arm finds its way around my shoulders.

The show ends and I get up rather quickly because I don't really know what to do being this close to Jake. He and Abby say their goodbyes and I walk Jake to the door.

"Thanks so much for bringing dinner. You really didn't have to do that." I say shyly.

He grins, "It was nothing. I like spending time with you Liv."

I feel my cheeks get warm and I look away.

"I'm really looking forward to dinner on Friday." He says.

I smile, "Yeah it will be fun."

"Goodnight Liv." He says and I'm caught off guard when he leans in to kiss me.

He pulls back after a moment and I'm in a little bit of a daze. He smiles at me, "I've been wanting to do that all night."

I smile shyly, "Goodnight Jake. I'll see you tomorrow." And with that he heads out.

I walk back into the apartment and Abby is sitting on the sofa with a knowing look on her face.

"What?" I ask, trying to feign innocence.

She rolls her eyes, "That boy is already obsessed with you."

I laugh and shrug her off, "Oh whatever!" And I just head into my room.

The rest of the week goes by slowly until Friday morning when we arrive at the firm. We are getting settled into our work when Fitz pops his head in the office. "Hey gladiators, how's the research today?"

Everyone responds politely and I just beam at him, sometimes I just don't know how to find words around him. Suddenly I'm knocked out of my stupor when he turn to me and says, "Liv, can I see you?"

I get up and start to walk over to him but he stops me, "Oh, you might want to grab your things. I have a little outing for you."

I glance over at Jake and see that he's frowning but I don't care because I know we're going to Langley and I'm so excited.

I grab my things and head out with Fitz and we walk into his office.

He shuts the door behind us and turns toward me, "Ready for Langley?"

I know my eyes light up and I nod my head fervently, "Yes! I am definitely ready."

He laughs and nods his head, "You all right to drive with me? I promise I'm a decent driver."

I laugh, "Yeah, that's fine. I assume your music choices are mostly Paul McCartney, Wings, and The Beatles?"

Fitz shakes his head and laughs, "You would be absolutely correct Miss Pope."

I smile, "Sounds good to me."

We head out and into the parking structure. Fitz leads me to his car, a sleek white Audi RS 5 that is absolutely gorgeous. He kindly opens the door for me and I get into the car.

Fitz walks around and gets into the drivers seat and without a word we head out. Most of the drive will be on the GW Parkway so I calculate it should take us around 15 to 20 minutes depending on the traffic. That means I have 15 to 20 minutes alone with Fitz.

The drive goes by quickly. We chat mostly about music and he's surprised to find out I'm really into old rock n' roll.

We arrive at Langley and just looking at the building I'm totally intimidated. We walk in and go through security. We have to check our cell phones at the door and then we get special passes. Right as we're finished Fitz's friend appears and introduces himself. His name is Matt Winters and he looks about Fitz's age.

They make small talk as Matt leads us to a small conference room down several winding hallways.

He shuts the door behind us and turns around, "Everything I say to you has to stay between us. We're giving you this information to help you find a killer and everything I tell you that leads you to your killer needs to stay clear of company involvement. We can help you, you just can't let anyone know we're helping you."

Fitz nods his head, "We can work with that. What do you know?"

Matt tells us that Sophie Williams was a translator. She would sit in on interrogations and make sure the proper tactics were being used. She was also in charge of a secret operation working to expose double agents working within the CIA and the bureau.

The CIA had uncovered intel that there might be a double agent in the field and it was her mission to figure out the merits of that intel.

Matt gives us a briefcase of documents and explains that those are her notes from her assignments. He explains that he has given us the decoded version of her notes and explains the necessity of keeping them a secret.

Matt explains to us that after her last mission was completed she had asked for a transfer back to the states but never really explained why. I guess that is something we are going to have to figure out ourselves. When we finish we head out of the conference room we pause for a minute as Fitz chats with Matt about their shared love of the Nationals. They're talking and all of a sudden I see someone I recognize at the end of the hallway and I am completely and totally shocked.

I start walking down the hallway but the person rounds the corner and by the time I arrive has completely vanished.

Fitz and Matt must have realized I ran off a moment later because they rush after me.

"Olivia, hey you can't run off like that in here." Matt says, he's being nice but I can tell I've made him a little nervous.

"I'm sorry. I saw someone…I saw…um…I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to startle you."

Fitz narrows his eyes at me, he definitely knows something is up and right now I feel like I need to cry so I just try to keep a straight face and pray we're going to leave now.

Fitz turns to Matt, "Thanks so much for the information. We'll be in contact soon." He shakes Fitz hand and then turns to shake mine.

"It was a pleasure to meet you Olivia."

I manage a small smile, "Likewise. Thank you for allowing me to come with Fitz. I greatly appreciate the opportunity."

He smiles and we say goodbye and we leave.

We walk through the building and get to the exit and as we walk outside I run to the first trash can I see and I empty the contents of my stomach into it.

Fitz rushes to me and is rubbing my back gently. When I'm done I stand up and he sweetly hands me a couple tissues and then offers me his water bottle, which I gratefully take. He's holding onto my bicep gently, he's probably afraid I'm going to fall over.

I catch my breath and I finally look up at him.

He looks very concerned and he's still holding onto my arm.

"Olivia, what's going on? What happened in there? You look like you saw a ghost."

I look around to see how many people are around us and Fitz senses my discomfort.

"Let's go to the car." He says and he leads me to the car.

We get in and I take another gulp of water. Fitz is just staring at me patiently and waiting for me to divulge my secret.

"I um…I saw my Dad in there."

Fitz's face falls into a frown and I continue talking.

"I know I only saw him for a moment but Fitz…I know that was my Dad."

Fitz is just sitting there like he's contemplating the information but he doesn't seem too shocked.

I narrow my eyes, "Why don't you look surprised?"

He shakes his head, "I'm sorry. I just…when I asked Matt to get you a pass he had to do a background check and when he called me back he told me you hadn't passed. Of course I was totally shocked and told him to do it again because there was no way you wouldn't pass a background check. So he did and then he went through your information himself and he agreed with me so he decided it must have been a fluke and he overrode the system. That…that could be the reason you were initially denied."

"Wouldn't he know that though?"

Fitz shakes his head, "Not necessarily. The CIA is a huge organization and identities are kept as secret as possible in order to protect the agents."

I bite my lip, "So, what you're saying is…my Dad could be CIA?"

Fitz nods his head, "I guess so...what does your father even do for a living?"

"He's in security administration. He does everything from field-testing new weapons to new computer security. That's why he travels so much. I…I don't really know much about it other than that. He doesn't talk about his job and we barely talk as is."

Fitz looks at me with what I can only describe as pity.

"Don't pity me." I snap, "I'm not a child who's fallen off her bike and skinned her knee. I don't want or need your pity."

My hands fly over my mouth and I immediately regret what I've said. I turn to him, completely embarrassed, "Oh my gosh Fitz, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you like that. That was so inappropriate and when you were just being kind. I'm so sorry."

I'm a little shocked when he starts to laugh, "No, don't apologize. You're right; you're just nothing like the women I'm used to dealing with. I like that you put me in my place. It was refreshing and it just boots the already high level of confidence I have in you. Don't ever loose that. Not taking shit from people is a great quality for a lawyer to have."

I smile shyly, "Thank you. I appreciate that. But I'm still sorry I snapped at you. I could have at least said it in a nicer way. I mean you are my boss…and my teacher."

His face drops into a frown but he immediately tries to hide it. It's almost like he's forgotten about that little detail. He tries to brush it off, "That's all right, just don't tell the others I let you talk to me like that."

I laugh, "I promise I won't."

We drive in silence for a few minutes until I break it, "Fitz, how can I find out if my Dad really is CIA?"

He sighs, "Well, we could ask Matt but he won't be able to confirm or deny anything because your father is not the subject of any investigation. But we could ask JJ to run his information through her technical analyst at the Bureau. We won't get confirmation of whether or not he's CIA but that could give us some leads."

I shake my head; "You don't have to do that for me. I don't want to make you call in any favors."

Fitz shakes his head, "Nonsense. I don't mind at all. If you can give me his basic information and a recent picture then I will give it to JJ."

I smile, "Really Fitz, it's not a big deal."

He cuts me off before I can continue, "Olivia, you deserve to know this and I can help you. Please let me."

I purse my lips together and look at him—he looks so sincere. I nod my head. "Okay, thank you."

"Anytime." He says softly and then adds, "But Olivia he could just do business with the company. If he really is in security administration there's a high likelihood of that. He may just have been there doing business."

I take a deep breath, "Okay. I like that scenario."

He smiles, "Either way, it's all going to be all right. You're going to be all right." He says as he reaches over the console and lightly squeezes my hand.

I'm disappointed when he releases my hand and places it back on the steering wheel. We settle into a comfortable silence for a few minutes until Fitz breaks it.

We're fairly close to the office when Fitz says, "So um, do you need anything at the office? If not I can just drop you off at home."

I smile, "Um, thanks but you can just take me back to the office. I'm supposed to be getting a ride with Jake."

He frowns again, "Oh, I didn't realize you two were seeing each other."

I shake my head, "No, we're not. I'm not…we're just friends."

He gives me a small smile and nods his head. I'm not sure he totally believes me.

"He's um…we're both from Brooklyn originally. I guess its nice to have a friend from the only place that ever really felt like a cookie-cutter, holiday card version of home."

His facial expression softens, "I get that. It must have been hard to have been uprooted so much as a kid."

I shrug, "I just got used to it. And I really did love boarding school. I felt like I had more family there than I did at home."

"That's good…but it's also kind of sad."

"Yeah, but I think its better than never feeling like I had a family. I talk to my favorite teachers from Rodean, Surval Montreaux, and Stanford more than I do my own father but at least I have people to talk to."

He smiles at me, "I suppose you're right, miss glass half full."

I laugh, "Yeah, I guess I that means I'm not a total pessimist. I guess that's good."

He smiles and we pull into the parking structure under the firm. I move to get out of the car and to my pleasant surprise Fitz reaches over and grabs my hand again.

I pause and turn toward him.

"Liv if you want to talk about this, whether it be about getting information or just venting frustrations, please know that I'm here. You can call or text any time and I'm here."

My heart swoons at this comment even though I know he's making it mostly out of pity. I smile, "Thank you. I appreciate that."

We both get out of the car and start to walk back into the building. "So do you have any fun plans for the weekend?" Fitz asks.

I laugh and shake my head, "Nope, lots of studying for me."

"What about your date with Jake?" He says, and I can't help it when I grin to myself because I know he's prying.

"Um, it's not a date its just dinner. What about you? Any big plans?"

He scoffs, "I'm a painfully boring man. I'll probably spend the weekend working on this case and grading papers."

I bite my lip, "Oh come on, you're not boring. I'm sure you could have a hot date if you wanted one."

He cocks his head to the side and smiles at me, "Well, thank you. A friend has been trying to convince me to go on a blind date but I'm not much for that sort of thing. I like to get to know a woman before I decide to date her."

"So you're old-fashioned?"

He laughs, "I guess in that regard. I just don't like to lead women on."

"Well, as a woman I can tell you that is refreshing to hear."

Unfortunately before I can finish my thought we are walking into the office and we run right into Jake.

"Liv! There you are, you ready to head out?"

I sigh, I was having a moment with Fitz and Jake just ruined it. "Um yeah, just let me grab a few things from my desk."

I turn to Fitz who is still standing there, "Have a good weekend and thank you for today."

He grins, "Anytime." And he waves as he starts to walk away and I just want to stare at how perfect he is but unfortunately I can't because Jake is right there.

I finally focus my attention on him, "Can you wait a minute?"

He nods and I head back into the office to grab a few things from my desk and I sigh. I like Jake, I really do, but I just can't shake this nagging feeling that although Jake is gorgeous, I'll never feel about him the way I feel about Fitz because my feelings for him are definitely escalating to more than just a crush.


	5. Chapter 5

"_I do the very best I know how—and the very best I can; and I mean to keep on doing so until the end." _

– _Abraham Lincoln_

* * *

Jake and my dinner went surprisingly well. We get along very well and I really do like him. He's sweet and funny and intelligent—not to mention handsome. He's everything a normal girl would swoon over. But I unfortunately am not normal and therefore cannot stop thinking about my incredibly handsome, totally inaccessible boss.

We arrive back at my apartment after dinner to watch a movie and I head to the bathroom to freshen up. I look at myself in the mirror and decide to give myself a silent pep talk. I can't like Fitz. I'm sure any signs he's sending me are ones of kindness and probably a little pity after the information we stumbled across today—that I've decided to just not think about because honestly I can't have another distraction right now. Anything happening with Fitz could mean big trouble for both of us. I could get kicked out of school and Fitz could loose his job. Those are very high stakes. I cannot get kicked out of school. All I've ever wanted is to go to law school. I can't let this happen and I like Jake enough. Maybe I just need to do this at least for the distraction. A distraction to take my mind off my other distractions…that sounds ridiculous, nevertheless I do need a distraction from my distractions and I bet Abby is right, it may take a little while but I think I could really like Jake. After all, I didn't immediately like Gio. It took me a while but I grew to love him. Maybe the same thing could happen with Jake?

I go back out to the living room and Jake already has the movie all queued up. I decide to be bold and I take a seat right next to him and lean into his chest. I tentatively wrap my arm around his torso and he starts to lightly stroke my back.

We just sit like this for a little while and I'm honestly getting a little frustrated that Jake isn't making more of a move when suddenly he surprises me and turns around and quickly but gently lowers me onto my back on the sofa.

He starts to kiss me and I decide I'm just going to let myself enjoy it and surprisingly I start to. Jake is a good kisser and I'm actually getting into this. His hand starts to make its way down to the hem of my shirt and he plays with it for a moment before his hand starts to move under my shirt and up my body.

My breath hitches but I don't focus on it and I'm all right. I've had guys touch me before so as long as it doesn't go much farther than this I'm going to be all right.

We continue kissing and his hand moves farther up my shirt and reaches my bra. He's caressing my breast over my bra and I'm okay with that. I may be a virgin but I'm not a prude. He then starts to kiss down my neck and that makes me panic a little so I decide I need to stop him.

I push him back and I take a deep breath. He looks confused.

"I'm sorry," I say, "I um, I need to tell you something."

He looks concerned as he adjusts himself so he's now sitting on the sofa again and I do the same.

I take a deep breath and start to speak, "Okay, I told you last time we made out that we weren't having sex, but I feel like I should clarify that. We won't be having sex anytime soon…because I've never had sex."

Jake looks almost shocked by my confession. I cringe and wait for him to speak.

Instead he reaches forward and gently grabs my hand. "Hey, Liv, don't worry about it. We don't need to have sex. We can go as slow as you want."

I smile, "Really, are you sure you're okay with this?"

He smiles, "Really Liv, we can go as slow as you want for now and then one day you'll be comfortable enough to go all the way." He pauses and his face turns a little pale, "Unless you're waiting until you're married?"

I can't stop myself from laughing, "No, I'm not. I just want to make sure it's the right thing for me. Thank you for understanding."

I look up at the clock, it's a little after 12 and I'm pretty tired. Jake must notice because he stands up and reaches out to grab my hand. "Come on, let's go to bed?"

I stand up and take his hand. I smile, "Remember my rules? No sleep overs."

Jake laughs and pulls me close to his body, "I think you should break this rule."

I laugh, "Jeez, one date and you're already trying to get me to break my rules. You're an impatient man Jake Ballard."

He laughs and leans down to kiss my jaw lightly. "Come on Liv, rules were made to be broken. I promise I won't try anything. It will just be you and me cuddling in your bed."

I bite my lip, I'm not nervous about him trying anything. I believe him that he won't. I'm actually nervous because I kind of want him to sleep over. He steps forward and starts to kiss me again and I decide caving on this one rule seems like a great idea.

I push him away and laugh, "Okay, you can spend the night. But we aren't doing anything other than kissing."

He holds his hands up in surrender and grins, "Absolutely."

I wake up the next morning and I'm a little startled at first when I realize I can't move but I relax when I remember it's because Jake is in bed with me. One of his arms is still around me and his warm body is pressed close to mine. He made good on his promise and apart from some light kissing he was the perfect gentleman the entire night.

I peel myself out of his arms and I walk over to Abby's room. I knock on the door and it pushes open and I peek in to see if Abby is up yet—or even if she came home. I frown when I see she's not home and I head out to the kitchen to make some coffee.

I make the coffee and pour myself a cup. Jake is not up yet so I stay in the kitchen. All of a sudden I hear the key turn in the front door and Abby slinks inside.

She definitely had fun last night. Her hair is a mess and she's still wearing the revealing dress she left in last night. "Hey there roomie, big night?"

She turns toward me and her eyes grow wide, "Liv!" She doesn't waste any time delving into her scandalous activities, "I slept with Will. It was…pretty great."

I laugh, "Well you certainly look like you had a good time. How about I make you a cup of coffee and we can talk while you get cleaned up?"

Abby grins, "You're the best Liv."

I grab her a cup and head to her bedroom. She pauses when we walk past my slightly ajar door and I know she sees Jake. "Oh my god, you didn't? Did you?" She quietly exclaims.

"No!" I exclaim under my breath as I usher her into her bedroom.

We shut the door so we can be a little louder.

"Oh my god Liv! What happened?"

I shrug, "He wanted to sleep over so I let him. We didn't do anything other than kiss."

Abby is grinning like a maniac, "He's so into you Liv. So do you like him?"

I sigh, "Yeah, he's really nice, he's funny, we have a lot in common. I'm going to give him a chance."

Abby smiles, "So you're taking my advice?"

I nod, "I thought about it and I realized that I didn't like Gio like that right away either so maybe the same thing will happen with Jake?"

Abby frowns, "You're not back on the Gio thing, are you?"

I set my coffee down on her bedside table and sit down on her bed, "What do you mean 'back on the Gio thing'?"

Abby sits down next to me, "I mean I thought you weren't going to dwell on that anymore?"

I scoot back onto her bed pull my knees up, my hand unconsciously drifting up to my neck as I gently trace the scar that will never quite fade completely, "I'm not dwelling on it Abby but I'm allowed to think about him. I'm not just going to wake up one day and stop missing him. It's not as if it ended like a normal relationship."

Abby reaches out and grabs my hand, "I know sweetie. I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to come out the way it did. I'm sorry."

I shake my head, "I know Abby, it's fine. Now go wipe off your make-up and tell me about Will."

Abby grins as she gets up to grab a make-up remover cloth from her vanity and starts to take the make-up off her face. We chat about her night with Will and when she's finished she puts sweats on and climbs into bed with me where we drink our coffee and talk some more.

After a little while there's a soft knock at the door and Jake pokes his head in the room. "Good morning ladies."

"Morning Jake, I see you had a good night with my bestie here." Abby says.

Jake blushes a little bit, "We did have a good night, how was yours Abby?"

She grins, "Oh you know, a good stress reliever. Liv, scoot over so your boy here can have some space."

I blush and smack Abby on the arm but I scoot over to make room for Jake.

He slides in next to me and wraps an arm around my waist.

We all hang out and talk for a bit until Jake decides he should go home and get ready for the day before we meet our group at the library.

The rest of the weekend goes by slowly, we do a lot of studying and research and by the time Monday rolls around I can't help that I'm already excited to see Fitz.

Class goes by quickly, I honestly love to just listen to him talk. He's so passionate about what he's teaching and it makes the class so much more enjoyable. When class is over I'm talking with Abby and Emily when—to my great pleasure—Fitz calls my name.

"Miss Pope, could I speak to you for a moment?"

I can't help myself when I smile, "Of course Professor Grant."

Abby winks at me as she and Emily and the rest of the class finish filing out of the room.

Once everyone is out of the classroom Fitz turns to me and smiles, "How was your weekend Olivia?"

I can feel my face getting flush, "It was nice. How was yours?"

"Mine was nice as well. I got a good amount of work done. I have some research for you to do, outside of the office if that's all right?"

I nod my head, "Yeah of course. What will I be researching?"

He hands me a folder, "I need you to go to the Library of Congress. When you're there I need to go upstairs and wait. Once you're there a man will come over to you and ask you if you think there's a better album than Revolver. Your response needs to be that it's good but The White Album is your favorite."

I smile, "Easy enough to remember, The White Album actually is my favorite."

Fitz grins, "Me too. I knew you had good taste."

"So what am I supposed to talk with this man about?"

Fitz shakes his head, "Nothing. He's going to leave a folder on the table. It should just be in a manila envelope, nothing special. It will contain a list of names of possible international contacts Sophie Williams may have had. I need you to bring it immediately back to me once you get it and we will start going over the information upstairs. Is that all right?"

I nod my head, "Absolutely."

Fitz smiles "See you later Miss Pope."

I try not to grin too obviously, "Goodbye Professor Grant."

With that I head to my next class. I feel like the rest of the morning goes on forever because I am so anxious to head to the Library of Congress. This little meet feels like something out of a movie.

Unfortunately the actual event is a little underwhelming once I have it completed. It was simple, I sat down and waited for the man for only a few minutes, spoke my line when he approached me, then grabbed the folder he left me.

I scan the names because Fitz never said to wait to open it until I gave it to him. Most of them are foreign so that should be interesting.

I drive back to Fitz's office and when I get to his door I see that it is slightly ajar so I poke my head inside. He is on the phone but smiles at me nonetheless and waves me inside the office.

I take a seat in one of the comfy chairs opposite his desk and I wait for him to finish. He's talking deadlines and other boring things so I zone out and stare at the pictures on his desk. I zero in on the picture of him and Cyrus. Now that I get a closer look it seems as if they're at a Stanford football game. Now that I'm focusing on the picture I can see the stadium in the background and I see that Fitz's polo shirt has a small Stanford logo on the left side of his chest.

Suddenly I'm knocked out of my stupor, "Olivia?"

I can feel my face get flush with embarrassment, "I'm sorry. I was looking at the picture of you and Cyrus. How on earth did you get him to go to a football game?"

Fitz laughs, "It was quite the ordeal let me tell you. I ended up bribing him. If he went to the game with me then I would also bring him with me to the San Francisco Philharmonic."

I laugh, "Yep, that's probably the only way you could get him to a football game." And for a minute we're just sitting there smiling and laughing at each other.

It makes me slightly nervous so I bridge the silence and start to rummage through my bag for the file. "This is what he gave me, there's quite a few names in the file."

Fitz opens it and scans through it for a moment, his face forming a frown. "Yeah, this is going to take us a little while. I think the easiest thing to do right off the bat is get travel records for all of them. Obviously some may have used aliases but I think that's a good enough place to start for today. Shall we head upstairs?"

I nod my head and grab my bag as I get up to leave the room. Fitz opens the door for me and places his hand lightly on the small of my back as I walk out the door. His touch ignites something in my body and suddenly I feel warm all over. I walk down the hallway facing forward because my face feels flush and I don't want Fitz to notice.

We work silently, compiling data on each of the people we're investigating. Fitz is cute when he's concentrating. His hand ruffling his perfect hair and his brow furrowed. I can't stop myself from glancing at him every so often. He's beautiful in a way I didn't realize a man could be beautiful. His slightly crooked smile, his long and elegant fingers, his light brown curls, the way he purses his lips when he's concentrating. Everything about him draws me in, makes me want to know more.

I finally come across a travel record of a trip through DC. A man named Abel Mazir. He flew from Ankara into DC two weeks before Sophie Williams was murdered and there is record of a hotel stay in Annapolis with no indication he's left the area. That could be something. I hit print on the travel itinerary and I stand up to get it and show it to Fitz.

He looks up from his computer when I get up, "Got something?" He asks.

I nod as I reach for the papers that have just come out of the printer. "Flight into DC and a hotel stay in Annapolis for an Abel Mazir."

Fitz gets up and starts to walk toward me and for some reason this makes me nervous and I drop my papers.

Fitz bends down and I bend down and I immediately regret bending down because I'm wearing a skirt and it's so tight that I stumble a little when I bend over.

I don't fall because instead of reaching for the paper Fitz reaches toward me, his right hand cupping my elbow and his left hand gently touching my knee to help me steady myself.

I'm so embarrassed I could just collapse to the ground right here. I know I have to look at him so I turn my head up and I smile at him and he smiles back.

"Sorry, damn skirt." I mutter, hoisting myself back up.

He follows me up, his hand still attached to my elbow.

He just grins at me so I speak again, my voice quiet, "Thank you."

"You're welcome. Just for the record, I like the skirt."

My face gets hot as I straighten my new houndstooth skirt. For some reason I knew Fitz would like this skirt when I bought it last week. I manage to eek out a thank you and then shift my attention back to the travel records. Fitz is standing so close to me I can barely breathe. His head reading the records over my shoulder, he's so tall, I just love that. Come on Olivia. Focus. He's your boss. I need to remind myself of this because if I don't then I'm going to wind up falling so far down the rabbit hole that I'm never going to be able to climb out. All I want to do is lock myself in my room and blast Taylor Swift because I finally understand what she's been singing about all these years. I finally get it. 'This slope is treacherous. It was enchanting to meet you. I knew you were trouble when you walked in. All I know is you said hello and your eyes looked like coming home. Heaven can't help me now, nothing lasts forever but this is gonna take me down. You got that James Dean daydream look in your eye.' All these different song lyrics are swirling around my head and I'm having a hard time thinking about anything else. And now I can smell him. Oh god, I can't place his cologne and I wish I could because it smells heavenly and now I'm getting light headed. Dear lord what is this man doing to me? I need to get out of here. I need to run downstairs to Abby and immediately freak out about all these feelings but my feet are glued to the floor and honestly even if they weren't I don't think I'd be able to tear myself away from him anyway. I have never experienced these feelings before. I want him so much.

But I can't have him. He's my boss and my teacher. This cannot happen. Logically I know I can't do anything about this crush. It could all go to hell and ruin any chance I have of a future career, the scary thing is that doesn't make me want it any less.

He finishes reading the document and steps away from me and I let out a sigh I didn't know I was holding inside. We are no longer in close proximity and I hate myself for missing that. I am so completely pathetic.

He sits down at the table and rummages through a folder for another file.

I walk over to him and sit down next to him. He then hands me the new file and starts to explain it to me. I try my hardest to focus on what he's saying instead of how much I want to kiss his beautiful mouth.

He wants me to look further into this Abel Mazir and I am happy to oblige. We work diligently for the rest of the day until a little after 5 PM when there's a knock at the door. I open it and am relieved to find Abby instead of Jake.

"You ready to go Liv?" She asks.

I look back at Fitz as if to silently ask for permission. He looks at his watch and then at me, "I'm so sorry Olivia. I lost track of time." He then stands up and starts to put his things away.

Abby smiles, "I'll meet you downstairs. By the way, Jake was looking for you. I think he wants to study tonight or something." She says, trying to be quiet so Fitz doesn't hear.

I nod my head in understanding, "I'll get my things and meet you guys in the lobby."

Abby nods and heads back downstairs and I turn around to help Fitz clean up.

We're quiet as we put the scattered files away and then grab our things as we start to leave the room. Fitz opens the door for me, "I'll see you tomorrow Olivia. Have a good night."

I smile at him, "Thanks Fitz, you too."

We are about to leave the building when Jake catches up with us. "Hey Liv, study at my place? I'll make you dinner?"

Abby is standing behind him and mouths 'GO'. I smile and nod my head, "Sure sounds like a plan. Why don't you send me your address? I need to get changed."

He nods and immediately pulls out his cell phone to send me his address. "Done. I'll see you soon Liv."

I smile and nod. He likes me too much and frankly it makes me a little uneasy.

Abby and I get home and she gets ready to go over to Will's while I get ready to go to Jake's.

"So what did you and Grant do all alone in your secret room today?"

I'm caught off guard by her question and therefore I send a handful of brushes flying off the counter.

I go to pick them up and Abby stops what she's doing, "Whoa Liv, you guys didn't actually do anything…did you?"

I stand up and put the brushes back on the counter. I sigh, "No, but honestly if he had made a pass at me I would not have refused."

Abby frowns, "Even though you've got a thing going with Jake?"

I groan, "It's not a 'thing'. We're just hanging out."

"Sorry Liv, I didn't mean to make you feel like the bad guy. I just…I thought you liked Jake?"

I turn around and hoist myself so I'm sitting on the counter. "I don't know. I thought I did too, but with Fitz I just get this feeling…something I've never felt before. I'm just drawn to him. I don't know how else to explain the feeling."

Abby finishes applying her lipstick and turns to me. "Well, all I know is that both of them would be crazy not to like you. So whatever you do, protect your heart Liv. I don't want to see you hurt."

I smile, "Thanks Abby. I appreciate the thought. And you should take your own advice."

She laughs, "You know, I thought Will was just going to be a hook-up but I may actually like him."

I pretend to look shocked, "Abby Whelan has real feelings? This is a miracle!"

She shakes her head at me laughing, "Who knew, right?"

I smile and hoist myself off the counter and take one last look in the mirror, "You think I look okay?"

She rolls her eyes, "Liv, you always look great. You could be wearing a sweat suit around a bunch of people in formal wear and still look ten times better than all of them combined."

I smile, "Thanks Abs. You could too."

She winks, "Oh Liv, I know."

And with that I burst out laughing. I honestly don't know how I would have gotten through undergrad without Abby.

"I'll probably be home late but probably not after 12 since we have to be up early. I'll text you if my plans change. You'll keep me updated on what you're doing?"

I nod, "Yeah of course, I'll probably be home earlier than you though."

She leans over to give me a kiss on the cheek, "Night bestie." She says as she skips out of the bathroom.

"Night bestie." I say, chuckling as I watch her and her childlike bliss leave for the night.

I arrive at Jake's just a bit later and we do study for a while but around 9 Jake suggests we watch some television and hang out.

We turn on the television and start watching some old episodes of 30 Rock. We're having a good time and I'm getting warm so close to Jake so I put my hair up in a ponytail.

All of a sudden I feel Jake's hand on my neck and I'm so startled that I jump off the sofa.

"Whoa Liv, what was that?"

I shake my head and cover my neck with my own hand. "Nothing. It was…I'm sorry you just startled me.

He frowns, "What happened?"

I try to shake it off, "Nothing, I was just focused on the show and you startled me."

He shakes his head, "No, sorry Liv, I meant you have a scar there, what's it from?"

"It's nothing. Just a scar." I say as I continue to hold my hand over it protectively.

He frowns and stands up, "It's pretty big Liv and you jumped when I touched it so it's obviously not nothing." He takes a step closer to me and I take a step back.

"Liv." He begs softly.

I sigh; I know he's going to keep bugging me about it so I should probably just tell him what happened. Well, I'm not going to tell him exactly what happened, I'll just tell him enough to make him back off. "I was involved in an…altercation." Well that's a bit of a lie. "It was just a flesh wound. Barely any blood." I'm lying again. Good going, Olivia.

Jake frowns, "You mean you were attacked?"

"It happened a long time ago." And there's another lie. It only happened four years ago. "I'd rather not talk about what happened. It's not something I like remembering."

He frowns and for a minute I fear he's going to keep pestering me about this issue. Instead he runs a hand through his hair and nod, "Okay. I'm sorry Liv. I didn't mean to bring up bad memories."

I sigh in relief, "It's okay. But um, I do think I need to get going. It's getting late."

He looks like he's going to protest but thankfully he must decide against it and I'm very grateful for that. He helps me gather my things and then walks me to the door. He lightly kisses me on the cheek and we say our goodbyes.

I drive back to the apartment and throw my things down when I enter. I then head to my room and throw myself onto my bed. I trace the scar on my neck lightly with my hand and I curse myself for forgetting to reapply concealer. When I wear concealer it's really only visible if you know what you're looking for, that is the reason no one at school—except Abby of course—knows it's even there.

I pick up my phone and I scroll through my contacts until I find the one I'm looking for. I am about to hit dial but pause as I frown because it's almost 11 in DC and that means it's barely 5 AM in Valencia. I sigh, I probably won't get an answer at this hour but I'll try just in case.

I type out a message instead.

_Hi. I hope I'm not disturbing you, but are you awake?_

I stare at my phone for a minute. I'm not going to get an answer. I stare at it for just a moment more and then decide to put it down, after all a watched phone never rings.

Just as I'm setting it down it begins to ring. It's an actual phone call and I smile when I see the name.

"Reina." I say, grateful to hear her voice.

"Hola querida." I sigh in relief when I hear Reina's lovely singsong voice with her amazing Spanish accent.

"You didn't have to call me right away. I'm so sorry if I woke you."

She laughs, "Querida, we're in Dubai. It's 8 in the morning. I'm already out at the pool."

I laugh, "That's right. I forgot you guys were in Dubai for the month."

She's silent for a moment before she reads my mind the way she always does. It's uncanny the way she does that even over the phone. "What's wrong Livia?" She asks.

"I…I…"I start to stutter as the tears start to fall.

"You miss him." She states, matter-of-factly.

I let out a short laugh, "I miss him all the time, Reina. It's constant. This is…different."

"You met someone else?" She says. It's comforting to know that after all these years Reina still knows me so well.

I take a deep breath, "Sort of."

"Uh oh, that sounds complicated. Do you want to tell me about it?"

"Do you really want to hear about it?"

"Of course I do querida. It's hard to know you're not talking about him but I want you to be happy and I know he wants you to be happy too. You are the only thing that makes me miss him less my dear. Plus giving you advice makes me feel youthful."

I laugh, "Reina, I don't think you could ever lose your youthful air."

She laughs, "Oh querida, I miss you. You must come to see us soon."

I smile, "I don't think I'll be able to make it until summer. I think this internship is going to take up most of my time."

I can practically hear her frown, "What about Christmas? We were planning on spending it in St. John."

I bite my lip, "Um, my Dad and I haven't planned anything yet. Even if we do I'll probably only be with him a day or two and head back."

Reina scowls, "That bastard. You'd think he could take a few days out of the year to appreciate his wonderful daughter."

This makes me smile. Reina severely dislikes my father. "Thanks Reina."

"I know he's your father but if you weren't an adult I would adopt you."

I laugh, "Sometimes I wish for that too."

She sighs, "Really though dear, if you want to go with us just call me. I don't care if you decide you want to see us on Christmas Day, we will fly you down immediately."

I can feel the tears threatening at my eyes again, "Thank you. I may take you up on that offer."

"If we can't make that work Tony and I will have to get out to DC sometime soon."

I smile, "I would like that very much."

"Me too dear. Now, please tell me about your boy problems." She urges me on.

"I've been sort of seeing this boy. He's very nice, intelligent, handsome, kind." I take a deep breath, "But then there's this other guy…and he's all of those things. But he…he makes me feel butterflies…the problem is that he's my boss."

"Hmmm…your boss."

I groan, "I know, it's bad."

She laughs, "No, it is not your fault querida. The heart wants what it wants."

"I've been trying…trying to like this other guy—the appropriate one. And I do like him, I just don't feel the _thing_ with him."

"Does the boss know you like him?" She asks.

I shake my head, "No way! At least…I hope he doesn't know. That would be embarrassing."

She laughs, "Darling, I don't think you're going to get over him until he at least knows how you feel. Maybe if you tell him how you feel, he'll reciprocate?"

I purse my lips, "He's um…he's also my teacher."

"Oh," she doesn't sound that surprised, "that does present a problem."

I sigh, "I know. I just…I can't help it."

"What about the other boy? What's wrong with him?"

I laugh, "That's just it, there's nothing _wrong_ with him. It's just that I don't feel a connection to him. He asked me about my scar and I freaked. Him touching it made me jump. He just…he likes me _so _much and I'm afraid I'm never going to be able to like him back in the same way."

Reina sighs, "That is a problem, Livia. But I think in the end you must do whatever your heart tells you to. No one can choose for you. Do what makes you happiest darling, god knows you deserve to be happy. Just be careful, you've worked very hard for everything you've earned and I don't want to see you throw that all away. But I believe in you querida, you will make the right decision. I know you will."

I smile as I brush away a small tear from my eyes, "Okay. Thanks Reina. I miss you."

"I miss you too dear and I love you. Text me tomorrow and we will talk again soon."

"I will and I love you too Reina. Give Tony my love as well."

She laughs, "He will be happy to receive it and I'm sure he sends it as well. And think about Christmas Livia, we'd love for you to come."

I nod, "I will. It already sounds a million times more appealing than spending the holiday with my father."

"All right, do your homework and get some sleep querida. Talk to you soon."

"Bye Reina." And with that I hang up the phone. I know I haven't resolved anything but I feel better anyway. Reina has that effect on me.

I lean over to my bedside table and open the drawer. I pull out a picture book and I flip it right open to a high school graduation picture and I stare at it for a bit. Gio and I look so happy in graduation gowns and Reina and Tony look so proud. It was a wonderful day. Of course my father didn't show up. I scoff. My own father—my only family—couldn't even be bothered to show up to my high school graduation. Called me the morning of graduation to let me know he was stuck in DC and wouldn't make it to the ceremony. I wasn't even that angry to be honest. I just told him not to bother coming at all. I had my family, Gio, Reina, and Tony, and everything was good.

I close the book. I have a hard time looking at more than one or two pictures at once. They always bring back too many memories.

I put the book away and I get ready for bed. Hopefully a good night of sleep will give me some perspective and anyway, tomorrow is another day.


	6. Chapter 6

_In recognizing the humanity of our fellow beings, we pay ourselves the highest tribute. _

– _Thurgood Marshall_

* * *

After the incident with Jake on Friday night I spend all day Saturday at the library looking over documents and statements and anything I think will give me an idea. By Sunday morning I realize what I need to do and I can't wait until Monday to talk to Fitz.

I pick up my phone and dial his number, praying he answers. When he does, I breathe a sigh of relief I didn't know I was holding inside.

"Hey Liv, what's going on?" He asks.

I bite my lip, "I have a favor I need to ask of you."

"All right, ask away."

"I want to talk to James Burton. I've been reading over his statement and I just…I need to talk to him. I need to see him, get a feel for his demeanor. I just have this theory about him and I need to see him to decide if I'm right."

"Okay, I'll make an appointment for us to go out to the prison tomorrow."

I smile, "Really? That was easy considering how pathetic my explanation was."

Fitz laughs, "I trust you. I'll make us an appointment."

My cheeks get hot; "You don't have to come with me if you're busy."

"You are definitely not going to prison alone. And I'm not too busy. I didn't get a chance to get out there last week and I owe him a visit. I need to update him on how the case is progressing."

"Okay, thanks Fitz."

"Thanks Liv, have a good rest of the weekend and remember to take a break. You deserve it."

I blush and am grateful he can't see me, "Thanks, you too."

The next morning after class I meet Fitz at his office to head out to the prison. It's about an hour away from the city and I can't decide if I'm more nervous to go to the prison or to ride in a car with Fitz for an hour.

Thankfully the trip is easy. We talk about music, Stanford, Cyrus, and find out we both share a love of The Mentalist and a fascination with body language.

The minute we pull up to the prison I immediately feel a lump in my throat. I've never visited a prison before and I honestly don't know what to expect. Fitz has arranged for us to have a tour of the facility as well. I want to see where James Burton is confined. I want to be able to understand his pain but now I don't know if I'm up for the task.

We walk into the prison and head through security. I'm wearing something completely out of the norm for me. I'm wearing a loose fitting black blouse that is buttoned all the way up, loose fitting grey slacks, and simple black ballet flats. My hair is down straight and I'm not even wearing any jewelry. This outfit makes me feel very strange. I am glad Fitz told me what to wear though because I can see how dressing like I normally do wouldn't be a great idea in a prison.

We get through the security checkpoint and are lead down a gloomy hallway to a small room with a table and chairs. I see James Burton and I am struck by how different he looks from the pictures. His face is gaunt, his brown beard is scruffy and his hair is unkempt. He looks almost like he's given up. Like he's resigned himself to idea of being in prison for the rest of his life. It's haunting in a way, to look into the eyes of someone who has lost all hope.

He stands up to greet up. There's no touching so he doesn't reach out to shake our hands, he just nods and greets Fitz. "Mr. Grant, I appreciate the visit."

Fitz smiles, "Jim, come on, you gotta start calling me Fitz." He then turns to me, "This is Olivia Pope, my best student. She's been working tirelessly on your case."

James manages a small smile, "Miss Pope, I appreciate your efforts."

"Please, you can call me Liv."

He smiles, this time it seems more genuine. "That's a nice name."

We all sit down and Fitz is the first one to speak, "Jim, I have something I need to tell you and it might be hard to hear."

Jim nods, "Okay."

Fitz sighs, "Sophie wasn't working for the State Department, she was working for the CIA."

Jim looks frozen for a moment and then he shakes his head as if he doesn't believe Fitz, "No, she…she was State Department…she was a translator."

"She was a translator, she didn't lie to you about that, but she was CIA. She couldn't tell you."

Jim just continues to shake his head until he finally breaks down, "How could she keep that from me? Did I even really know her?"

It's silent for a minute until Fitz speaks up, "Of course you knew her. This part of her life was something she couldn't tell you. It wasn't her choice. You were in the Marine Corps because you wanted to fight for your country, you wanted to make a difference and help people. For Sophie I'm sure it was the same. She was a translator and made sure interrogation techniques were above board. What she did in the CIA was stand up for humanity. She was a good person. She might have been lying about her job but I doubt she was lying about who she was. The Sophie you knew and loved was the real Sophie. I promise."

I can't help but smile at Fitz. I love how he's reassuring Jim. This is the man he only shows outside of the classroom or law office. This is who Fitz really is, a kind and loving soul."

Jim sighs and wipes away a few tears from his face and he composes himself. "It's just…it's a lot to process."

Fitz nods, "I know, and I'm sorry I had to be the one to tell you."

Jim nods, "No, I appreciate your honesty, but can we talk about something else?"

Fitz nods, "Yes, actually, Liv would like to speak to you." He says, pointing to me.

"Mr. Burton…" I start, but he interrupts. "Please call me Jim."

I smile, "Jim, I've read every part of your case and there isn't a single doubt in my mind that you're innocent…my problem is that I feel like a part of you believes you did this and that is holding you back."

He looks straight at me, stoic and silent.

"Please, if it's not too difficult, please recount what happened for me?"

He's silent for a moment and he nods his head before he starts his story, "I was an Army Ranger for ten years. Until almost two years ago when I suffered a traumatic brain injury from an IED and I found out I would never return to active duty again. I was honorably discharged and I moved back to D.C. I got a boring job at a security firm and I thought that was the end. Then I started having issues with rage, small things would make me angry. Then after the rage I would have blackouts, waking up not knowing what happened. They warned me I might experience that but I honestly never thought it would affect me. I've always been levelheaded. Mostly it came out with Sophie…but she understood. She would tell me to walk it off and I would be okay. Sophie worked…I thought she worked…for the Secretary of State so she was back and forth between the Middle East a lot. She had seen this before and she understood. She loved me and she supported me."

I can see his eyes start to water as he talks about Sophie; it's clear he still loves her and misses her dearly.

He takes a deep breath, "The day she died we had a big fight. I broke some things in the apartment and she was cool and calm as usual and she told me to walk it off. I must have blacked out because I don't remember anything from that moment and all of a sudden it was three hours later and when I walked into the apartment…" His voice starts to crack…"she was lying there in a pool of blood."

"But you found her that way, why would you think you did it?" I ask.

He sighs, "Because of the blackouts, what if I did it and blocked it out?"

My heart breaks at his defeated tone, this man is broken beyond repair and it crushes me. "You loved her. I don't believe you killed her. I swear to you I don't."

He shakes his head, "I appreciate your vote of confidence but if I can't be sure then how can I claim innocence?"

I bite my lip and turn to Fitz, "Can I speak to you over there for a moment? Sorry Jim, do you mind if I ask Fitz something privately?"

Jim nods his head, "Go right ahead."

Fitz and I stand up and walk outside the door for a moment.

"Fitz we could bring in a hypnotist."

Fitz looks skeptical, "We could never enter that into evidence. What would be the point?"

"The point is like he said, how can he claim innocence if even a little part of him thinks he did it? Unless he was drugged he can remember under hypnosis. This isn't for the trial this is for him. He needs to be confident in his innocence."

Fitz purses his lips and nods, "Lets just venture the idea to him today and then he can decide."

I nod and we walk back into the room.

Fitz sits down first, "Jim, Liv had a good idea. We think if we bring in a hypnotist we can help you remember where you were. Help you know you didn't kill Sophie. It wouldn't be admissible at trial but it would at least help you be confident in your plea."

Jim purses his lips and shakes his head, "I don't know. Can I think about it?"

Fitz nods, "Of course. Let me know."

They talk for a little while about witnesses and different aspects of the trial while I listen intently. When we leave I think Jim looks a little more at ease though I know from experience that the emptiness he feels at losing Sophie will never completely go away.

We are now about to take a tour of the prison led by the warden.

He shakes my hand. He's very cordial and happy to show us around his prison. We walk through the cellblock where the higher security prisoners are and Fitz grabs my arm tightly and pulls me to his other side.

I look over and I realize it's because the cells are on the side I was originally standing on and he wants to be between the prisoners and me. It makes me feel a little good, like he's looking out for me.

They are mostly quiet, a few whistle but not many. Towards the end there are more comments and I can feel Fitz's hand grip my arm tighter. We make it out of the cellblock to see the recreation area. It's got an outdoor area but it's still suffocating. I don't know how these men don't go crazy.

Once we finish the tour we gather our things at the door and I can't help but take a deep breath when we step outside into the fresh air.

"Thank you for taking me here Fitz. I'm glad I got to meet Jim."

Fitz smiles, "He's a good person. I don't believe he did it either. There's got to be more to the story. At first I thought he might have known about Sophie's CIA history and just didn't want to give it up but now I'm sure he thought she was with the State Department. I don't think he would have let her continue if he knew what she was actually doing."

I nod my head, "He really loved her. I can tell. It's so sad. It's bad enough to lose the person you love but to then be accused of murdering them…god I can't even imagine the pain."

Fitz frowns at me, "It sounds like you speak from experience."

I purse my lips; I don't really want to divulge my deep dark secrets right now. "I, um, I guess. I lost my Mom when I was nine and she was my best friend."

Fitz nods, "That's right. I'm very sorry Olivia."

I shake my head; I really need to change the subject because I know he knows there's more to my knowledge of losing someone you love than just my mother. I deflect, "Do you think we could grab a snack? I was so nervous I barely ate all morning."

Fitz laughs, "Of course…you were really nervous about this? You seemed so calm and collected."

I laugh as I get in the car, "I was incredibly nervous. I've never been to a prison before and I just…I didn't know what to expect from Jim. It was eye opening."

Fitz sighs, "Yeah, it's quite the experience. I think Jim enjoyed seeing someone other than me for once."

I smile, "I didn't think I'd feel so much for him…he just seems so resigned. I really think he would benefit from the hypnosis. I hope he agrees to it."

Fitz nods, "I hope so too. I think him being sure of his own innocence will go a long way for us."

Fitz finds a Smashburger and we decide to stop and grab a quick meal.

"Ever been here before? They have a good black bean burger and their fries are good."

I shake my head, "Never, but I do like a black bean burger."

We order our food and find a booth and sit down. It's nice to be around him in this casual location. He's left his tie in the car and his top button is undone and it looks so sexy.

The food comes quickly and before I take a bite Fitz says, "Now, I know it won't be as good as In-N-Out, but give it a chance."

I can't help it when I burst out laughing, "Why did you have to say that? Now all I can think about is a grilled cheese with animal style fries and a strawberry milkshake!"

Fitz grins, "Good that sounds amazing. I don't think I've had one in at least three years!"

My eyes grow wide, "What? How have you survived?! The last thing Abby and I ate before we drove out here was In-N-Out. That was only two months ago and I already miss it!"

Fitz smiles, "I haven't been home much the last couple years and every time I am it's a holiday so I haven't had a chance to stop."

"That's a bummer. Maybe next time you'll get to stop."

We both take bites of our black bean burgers. Fitz was right, they are very good, and the fries are great too.

"These are definitely good. You were right."

"Good. I'm glad. Though I hate myself a little bit for mentioning In-N-Out. I honestly think if I knew a meal was going to be my last it would have to be In-N-Out."

I smile, "Definitely. Plus maybe some fries from Ultimate Burger. Those are heaven."

Fitz frowns, "Ultimate Burger?"

My eyes light up, "Oh my gosh, it's this restaurant in Kona. Their food is second only to In-N-Out. My Mom had this thing about when we were on vacation we only ate locally and she loved finding these small little restaurants. That was one of our favorites. We used to stay in Waikoloa but we'd drive down to Kona just for Ultimate Burger. It's so good."

Fitz smiles at me, "At least you have good memories with her."

I nod, "I used to think that was bad. Like if we somehow had a bad relationship it would make things easier after she died. Then I realized that remembering all those things about her didn't have to make me sad. I had ten wonderful years with her and I do still miss her but I choose to remember her as the happy, full of life woman she always was."

I pause, "Does Jim have parents?"

Fitz nods, "His mother. She lives in South Carolina though so she's not able to make it up very often. I know he calls her quite a bit. His father died a few years back."

I sigh, "Well, that's good about his mother."

Fitz nods, "She's going to come up for the trial but she wants to save her time off."

"Yeah, and it probably wouldn't be the best for either of them to meet in prison. I can't imagine how hard that would be."

"Yeah, I don't think I'd ever want my mother to have to come visit me in prison."

We switch the conversation to some lighter topics while we eat but it gets real again pretty quickly.

"What made you want to go to law school?" Fitz asks me.

I smile, "Idealism. I wanted to change the world."

"Wanted?" Fitz probes.

I sigh, "I've realized it's not that easy. Now I just want to right wrongs. I want to make sure the justice system works the way it's supposed to. Why did you go to law school?"

He chuckles, "Actually my father made me go to law school, he wanted me to be a politician but I was a lot like you. I wanted to actually make a difference."

"You wanted to wear the white hat?" I tease.

Fitz laughs, "Something like that."

"So your father wanted you to be a politician?" I say, cringing.

Fitz laughs, "Yeah, he was a senator from California but he thought I could be president. He's thoroughly disappointed that I am just a lawyer."

I frown, "You're a great lawyer. He should be proud of you. You actually help people. You make a difference. Being a politician is so sleazy. You should be proud of yourself, you're kind of amazing."

He turns to me and smiles, "Thanks Livvy, That means a lot coming from you."

I can feel my face get hot. No one calls me Livvy, I don't really like it all that much, but coming from him it sounds…perfect. I smile, "You're welcome."

"So…you and your father don't see eye to eye?" I ask, hoping I'm not getting too personal.

Fitz nods, "Not at all. Let's just say I've worked very hard to be nothing like him."

I frown, "I'm sorry, that must be hard."

He shakes his head; "I realized I'm better off keeping my distance from him. We're cordial at family events but we don't really speak other than that."

"I don't speak to my Dad much either. I guess we have that in common."

Fitz smiles, a small but sincere smile, "That's a little sad."

I shrug, "You're probably right, but you've obviously turned out very well and…and I think I've turned out all right so far."

"You have turned out great. Never doubt that for a second."

I can feel my face heating up at his comment so I look down and finish eating the rest of my black bean burger.

After that we finish our food and head back to DC. Fitz drops me at my apartment and I walk upstairs to find Abby sitting in the kitchen hovered over a book. She glares at me, "Where the hell have you been?"

I frown, "What are you talking about? I went to the prison with Fitz, I told you."

"Yeah, _hours_ ago. Your phone has been going straight to voicemail. I was freaking out! I figured something awful happened and you were stuck in a prison gang war or something."

I roll my eyes and sit down next to her, "Don't be dramatic. I turned my phone off and left it in the car while we were in the prison and I just forgot to turn it back on."

Abby's eyes light up and I know that can't be good, "So you were having such a nice time with Grant that you forgot to turn your phone back on."

I roll my eyes, "Come on, he's just…nice to talk to."

She smiles, "What do you guys talk about?"

I shrug, "We talk a lot about our dads. He has kind of a deadbeat dad as well. I've told him a lot about my Mom. I don't know…it's just…it's easy with him and you know me, talking has never been easy."

Abby laughs, "Yeah, I don't think I really knew you for a full year until I visited you in Chicago first summer after freshman year."

"I haven't told him about Gio or anything involving that situation yet but he knows more about my family situation than any of our friends here or from Stanford. The other night when I went over to Jake's he saw my scar. I forgot to put concealer on it and he saw it and he reached out to touch it and I freaked out. I avoided his questions at all costs."

Abby frowns, "What did you tell him?"

"Practically nothing. I told him it happened a long time ago and I didn't want to talk about it. I don't want him to know. I…I kind of like him but I can't tell him that. It's too…personal."

"Dating is personal, Liv. That's the point. Finding someone you can tell anything to…maybe the professor is that person?"

I shake my head, "No, he can't be. He's our teacher and mentor and I can risk ruining that for some…feeling. I like Jake, I really do, I'm…I'm going to try to make it work with him."

Abby sighs, "Liv, you can't make yourself love someone."

I shake my head, "What if you only get one person? One person to love and that's it? Well, I had my one person and now all I get is someone I like enough."

Abby rolls her eyes, "That's not true and you know it. There's more than one person out there for you. How insane would that be if there was only one person for every person on the planet? No one would ever find love. If you insist on sticking with Jake I'll support you but keep in mind that I think you should at least figure out where Grant stands with you. I think you'll always regret it if you don't."

I sigh and run a hand through my hair, "Okay. I will. Thanks Abs." I stand up, "I think I'm going to go transcribe some notes in my room. Try to think about something else."

"Okay." She says and as I start to walk away she reaches out to grab my arm gently. I turn around, confused. "You know I always love you, right?"

I smile, "I know. I always love you too."

Throughout the next day I find that the point in my day I look forward to most is going to the law firm and knowing I'm going to see Fitz. I am the first to arrive as usual and I drop my things off in the interns' office before heading to Fitz's. I walk down to Fitz's office and I am surprised to hear a woman's voice coming from the room. I pause before I get in sight of his office. Dammit, I can't make out what they are saying from this distance. I don't recognize the voice but it's probably another lawyer. There are about fifty of them here. She's probably from another division.

I decide to suck it up and continue walking toward his office but before I get there the woman walks out. She walks down the opposite end of the hallway so I don't get a good look at her face. I knock on the door to Fitz's office and when he looks up the frustrated frown on his face changes into a grin, "Livvy, come on in."

I smile, "Thanks." I pause and decide to pry in the form of a joke, "Girlfriend?" I ask lightly, a jovial grin on my face.

Thankfully he takes it the way I intend and he laughs and runs a hand through his hair, "Co-worker. Mellie Montgomery. She does corporate law here at the firm." He pauses and cringes, "But she's also my ex-girlfriend. She was…a bit much to handle."

I let out a massive sigh of relief I didn't know I was holding inside, "Oh, I'm sorry."

He shakes his head, "Don't be, it would have never worked out. She's just not the one for me."

I can't help myself from just gaping at him. He's so beautiful and kind and just all-around wonderful. I'd do anything to be his one. He's smiling at me now, this gorgeous, slightly crooked, smile and I manage to shake myself out of my stupor. "Well, I'm sure you won't have any problems finding the one. I bet beautiful girls are pounding down your door for the chance to date you." My eyes grow wide and my hand flies upward to cover my mouth. I cannot believe I just said that out loud.

Luckily he doesn't seem to mind my inappropriate comment. "You're too kind to me Livvy. But I'm afraid I'm horribly picky. I want much more than a pretty face. She's got to be smart too. Someone who can put up with my shit but doesn't always let me get away with it. And she's got to be funny and she's got to think I'm funny—or at least be able to tolerate my terrible jokes. Plus she's got to appreciate Paul McCartney at least as much as I do."

I can't help myself when from grinning like an idiot. I cannot believe I like him even more after that little speech. "Well, what kind of a person doesn't think Paul McCartney is a musical genius and living legend?"

He grins, "You're the only one who truly gets me Livvy."

_Yes, that's because I'm probably in love with you._ I think to myself. But of course I can't say that out loud so I just sigh and feign a laugh.

We both grow quiet for a moment, it's not an awkward silence though, it's a comfortable one like we've known each other for years.

"So, um, did you have something you wanted to show me?" He asks, pointing to the file in my hand.

"Oh, um, yes. This is the information I gathered about the flight records and I know we narrowed it down to only one person who came through DC but when I double-checked the flight records I found out that one of them didn't actually get on the flight he booked. I'm going to head upstairs and look for aliases see if there's another clue. There's something really fishy about it."

Fitz smiles, "I know you'll figure it out Livvy."

My face gets hot and I nod, "Thanks. I'll update you soon."

I walk out of his office and I run right into Jake. He looks a little confused, "Hey Liv, what's going on?"

I shake my head and flash the file in my hand, "I just had to give update Fitz on something I've been working on."

Jake cocks his head and looks at me kind of like he doesn't believe me. I take a deep breath and he surprises me when he moves on to another subject. "So, do you want to study tonight? We have that big international law test on Friday."

I sigh in relief, "Yeah, that sounds nice. I think Abby was planning on having Will over, is that okay?"

He smiles, "Definitely."

I start walking back down the hall and I can't explain it but I feel…strange.


End file.
